Today, we got my brother a pet hamster because he has trouble making friends. We thought a hamster would be a good way to teach him about caring for others. I walked into the room and the hamster was hanging from the ceiling. Turns out there's a reason my brother doesn't have friends. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my brother's new kitten decided to bring me a gift as a sign of love. It was my pet hamster. FML
Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML
Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML
Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML
Today, my mom wanted to surprise me by buying me a hamster. When I got into her car, I was actually surprised and even said, "Hi" to the hamster. When we got home, the hamster was dead. FML
Today, I showed my family my new pet hamster. At the sight of him, my grandmother, who I had no idea hated rodents, let out a loud screech, causing my usually docile hamster to bite me and piss in my cupped hand. FML
Today, I found out my creepy, obsessive neighbor got a pet hamster and named it after me. He has been telling all sorts of stories about his hamster using my name, and he just told me in detail how it died of heart attack. FML
Today, my new roommate decided to put his pet hamster in the same cage as my beloved hamster. Apparently he wanted them to make hamster babies. They are both males. His hamster attacked mine and tore it to pieces. I just finished cleaning up the mess. FML
Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML
Today, my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML
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Top comments
i_live2fly 0
OMFG that is one ****** up kid!!!!!!!!
steakpak 0
Ya, that's gonna be a little problem. Most serial killers have a history of harming animals as children. You should seriously seek some professional help for him.
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Comments (511)
holdingmybreathe 0
wooooooow micheal myers much? not to be judgmental but try and get him some help
xxstealthxx 0
hamsters are useless stupid pets. they'll try to leap out of your hand to the ground cause they think their a foot away from it when there 4 feet away from it. they instantly die when they hit the ground, and they dont do much. useless pets
JonReb 0
This is incredibly scary. Get help for him now.. before it's too late.
SummerLover95 0
That's HIS FML. It sucks, but it's his fault, you have to teach him how to care about others by setting a good example, not by buying him a hamster.
omgitschristina8 0
poor hamster lol. And keep an eye on that kid lol
megelin 0
i guess today is irresponsible/stupid pet owner day. awesome.
paigeharper 0
wow, your brother is ****** up!! poor hamster:( your brother needs counseling, like what a ******* retard! i feel sorry for you to have such a dumb-shit for a brother! (and i feel bad for ur parents and/or other family members like your parents mush feel like failures to have such a horrible son, he's gunna grow up to be a very ****** up person!)
Soitgoes74 0
Y'know, those who abuse and/or kill small animals as children typically grow up up to hurt humans. He should probably see someone.
MonkeyFeathers 0
OH MY GOD that is sick and twisted get him some help because there is something seriously wrong with that boy and what ever you do don't let him near anymore live things until he gets help it could only get worse from there if you don't get him help and take everyone else's advice and lock yourself in your room if you haven't already
Mr_Positive 3
that kid DEFINITELY needs therapy, and the sooner the better, people who in young age kill animals have more than 50% chance of eventually hurting humans, save his life and lives of others !