Today, I took my boyfriend out to meet my coworkers for the first time. I really wanted to impress them, and get them to think how cool we are to hang out with, since I am new to LA. Instead, my boyfriend threw up in my boss's sink. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming, "What the fuck?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he was going to take me out somewhere special, so I called in sick for work. Turns out he had made reservations for the restaurant I worked at. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had dinner at my boss's house. Just before we were ready to eat, my girlfriend came to me with a desperate look in her eyes. Apparently, she took a dump, clogged the toilet, and it flooded. I took the hit for her, and now my boss thinks I'm a jackass. FML
Today, I took my boyfriend out to dinner to an expensive restaurant. He overate, and now I have to nurse him through food poisoning. FML
Today, I hung out with my crush for only the second time at his apartment. He was having a party. After a few sips of my green apple Smirnoff, I puked up the chinese food I had eaten earlier all over his new couch in front of him and a bunch of people I didn't know. FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Today, my boyfriend was seated in my section at work. As he sees me his face drops... he's on a date. He had forgotten I work there. I had to serve him and his date, and they didn't leave a tip. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me out to meet his friends. It was going really well until I left to use the bathroom and two of the girls with us came in and started talking about how creepy Matt's new girlfriend is and that they're happy he's going to dump her. My boyfriend is Matt. FML
Today, I invited my boyfriend to come to an event to meet some of my friends for the first time. I had been raving about him for weeks, and everyone was curious to meet this "amazing guy" I'd been dating. He showed up in a Darth Vader costume because he thought it would be funny to embarrass me. FML
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Top comments
sbarre1 0
I'm just impressed that he managed to eat the sink. ;)
birds_fml 7
I dunno whether this is a FYL or YDI, so I'm not clicking either. Maybe your boyfriend was genuinely sick, and it just happened to come on at a very bad time. Or maybe you're dating a loser who gets puke drunk before meeting his girlfriend's coworkers.
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Comments (61)
icedrake523 2
Don't see how this is a FML or YDI. Might have been sick or nervous. And better he throw up in your boss' sink than on your boss' floor or on your boss.
RedJester23 6
Ummm......... sorry......... if your Ashley or this is coincidental in which case, Thank god....
murderofcrows 0
Intoxicunt and plexico have AIDS I just hope through it all they can discover the meaning of truly having a life :(((
rachaelxlove 0
Can people stop fighting on FML? Its sooo pathetic how everyone gets mad over nothing. Stupppiddd
ziggyeye 0
wow
murderofcrows 0
how come you dont moderate intoxiCUNT fml? last time I heard, thats one of the worst curse words out there? are you CONDONING incest? as well as addiction AND female derogatory terms? woooow. thats almost as low as plexico's morals.
plexico 4
Hey, everybody, meet my boyfriend, Ralph.
redbluegreen 41
I wonder if he knows Chuck.
123sploosh 0
i dont understand you plexico
ananamoose 0
I was going to explain it in this big long paragraph just for you but your a ****** cuz you don't know so I'll just leave it with your response does not deserve a response so i responded to let you know that this response to your response responded to you that your responsse sucked
sirknz 0
Is he related to Herb?
plexico 4
123sploosh, Don't worry. Someone does.
KalvinAlexander 0
So what ?
ziggyeye 0
no way
ziggyeye 0
testing
redbluegreen 41
Did you succeed?