Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was showing my boyfriend some stuff I bought that day: a new thong and a bag of his favorite brand of peanuts. He was more excited about the peanuts. FML
Today, I offered to pay my boyfriend to buy me flowers. He still refused. FML
Today, I bought some flowers. As I was checking out, the cashier asked, "Aww, these for your mom? How sweet." I responded they were for a girl I liked. She laughed and said, "Sorry…" FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said, "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML
Today, I bought flowers with my groceries at the grocery store. After the cashier scanned them, he handed them back to me so they wouldn't get crushed in my cart. It was then that I realized he's the first man to ever hand me flowers. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend flowers. All she managed to do was to say, "It’s been a year since you brought me flowers." FML
Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML
Today, my boyfriend brought me home flowers and candy for the first time in our one-year relationship. Thinking he was going to finally propose, I got excited. I asked why he was being so sweet, and he responded with, "I thought you'd take the breakup better this way." FML
Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML
Today, I received a bouquet of flowers from my boyfriend, which is something he's never done before. Unfortunately, this was his way of apologizing for cheating on me. FML
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Top comments
Callmesam 10
Make cookies with them and then tell him he can't have any since he bought it for you as a gift.
Geometric 18
Your boyfriend is hilarious, I would laugh hysterically too :D
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Comments (124)
labanana_fml 5
If My Boyfriend did that to me I think I'd marry him.
flutter4 7
What a jerk
gemmadaws 3
What a keeper you lucky girl you suck so badly you very painful
GRgoldfish 19
I see a break up in your future.
Elfkid21 19
DollFace, it's time to find a decent boyfriend.
HeartOfLead 24
Give him credit; he's funny and he knows what kind of flour you like.
irgndsondepp 15
Everybody gets flowers...be happy you got something special. Plus it's an awesome story to tell.
NeoDerp 6
Epic troll
Cathrin 26
I'd have dumped the whole bag on his head for that
brittaaany_93 38
He's a keeper, OP!