Today, I tried to teach my dog tricks. Somehow, I thought it would be easier if I physically showed my dog how to roll, so I rolled on the floor in front of my dog. My sister recorded me and posted it on Facebook. Now everyone thinks I'm an idiot and my dog still can't roll. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought it would be cute to teach my dog a new trick in which I throw and then he brings me back a rolled up newspaper. He disappeared after it, then successfully returned with what turned out to be my neighbor's dirty boxer shorts. Apparently, my dog has a different definition of "fetch." FML
Today, I finally give rollerblading a try, since it looked so effortless. I put on all the gear and started skating down the street. Within seconds, I lost control, crashed into a garbage bin, and rolled directly into my neighbor's yard. I was so embarrassed that I just lay there pretending I was "just fine, really" while their dog licked my face. FML
Today, the canine behaviour course I am studying released a new assignment in which I need to film myself teaching a dog a new trick. The only dog I have access to is my sister's neurotic, anxious Chihuahua who bites at any sudden noise. FML
Today, I taught my dog to "give me his paw" as a cute trick. Now he won’t stop doing it. Anytime I try to eat, work, or sit down, I’m ambushed by a very proud dog pawing at my leg for treats. FML
Today, I tripped over my dog and landed on my face while trying to prove to my father that I can walk and chew gum at the same time. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who is a dog trainer, was telling me all about the techniques she uses at work. I commented on how the dogs must be stupid to fall for such simple tricks, to which she replied, "They worked on you." FML
Today, I tried to get a funny reaction from my dogs with a fart, like I saw in a YouTube video. I shat my pants and the dogs didn't even notice. FML
Today, I was excited to teach my new puppy how to fetch. I threw the stick, and he just stared at it, then stared back at me with his tongue lolling out, as if to say, "You threw it. You go get it." I’ve now spent the past 30 minutes fetching my own stick, hoping he'd join in. Nope. FML
Today, I pretended to be dead in front of my dog to see what he would do. He started to hump me, and when I tried to get up, he growled at me until I got back down on the ground to wait until he was finished. FML
Today, I felt lousy and decided to give myself a pep-talk in the mirror. After a while, I cheered up and went about my day. I soon found out that my sister had recorded me through the crack of the door and posted the video on Facebook. I'm humiliated. FML
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Top comments
white16sox 19
Monkey see, monkey post on Facebook.
babegirlsweetiep 0
Try rolling again? Your dogs bound to get it sooner or later.
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Comments (119)
poppaof6 0
Keep a look out for your sister when you teach him how to take a crap outside.
reneecooper77 0
haha
yourlifeisbetter_fml 0
Teach your sister how to play dead.
SlyTail 5
Maybe your dog doesn't want to look like an idiot like you.
77777771 12
Charming sister you've got their...
stormchaser24 24
Just hack her Facebook. Her password is simple I bet. If not make her take it down.
ashtonkay 7
Doesn't clean up the fact she put it up in the first place, I'm sure tons of people loved it and shared it and such. You cant erase what you've already seen.. If that were the case I would "un-see" a lot of what I have seen in te past. Scars dreamcatcher... SCARES.
KindaFunnyRight 8
At least you didn't show it how to do it's business in the yard..,
Mirano 0
Do a barrel roll!
THRASHtillDEATH 6
well you are an idiot.
DocBastard 40
Wow, that's ruff. Your sister acted like a bitch, so you should just Pinscher. Don't go ape shih-tsu, act melancollie, or try to hound her for an apology with a shar-pei tongue. Be careful you don't terrier hair out or Boxer in the ears over this silly prank. Just keep a Mastiff upper lip, and Beagle-ad that the video hasn't gone viral yet. Follow my advice, and you'll be Golden.
CryMoreFMLs 15
So... Many ... Puns...
Mirano 0
Hope you have a great dane
THE_A_TEEN 28
You killed my brain, then revived it, Doc. DAMN YOU!!!!
AMB3AST 7
Puns, gotta love them. Great job. ;D
CryMoreFMLs 15
No. Your name is fine as it is. I actually think the new name would made you sound slutty.