Today, I tried to teach my dog tricks. Somehow, I thought it would be easier if I physically showed my dog how to roll, so I rolled on the floor in front of my dog. My sister recorded me and posted it on Facebook. Now everyone thinks I'm an idiot and my dog still can't roll. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought it would be cute to teach my dog a new trick in which I throw and then he brings me back a rolled up newspaper. He disappeared after it, then successfully returned with what turned out to be my neighbor's dirty boxer shorts. Apparently, my dog has a different definition of "fetch." FML
Today, I finally give rollerblading a try, since it looked so effortless. I put on all the gear and started skating down the street. Within seconds, I lost control, crashed into a garbage bin, and rolled directly into my neighbor's yard. I was so embarrassed that I just lay there pretending I was "just fine, really" while their dog licked my face. FML
Today, the canine behaviour course I am studying released a new assignment in which I need to film myself teaching a dog a new trick. The only dog I have access to is my sister's neurotic, anxious Chihuahua who bites at any sudden noise. FML
Today, I taught my dog to "give me his paw" as a cute trick. Now he won’t stop doing it. Anytime I try to eat, work, or sit down, I’m ambushed by a very proud dog pawing at my leg for treats. FML
Today, I tripped over my dog and landed on my face while trying to prove to my father that I can walk and chew gum at the same time. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who is a dog trainer, was telling me all about the techniques she uses at work. I commented on how the dogs must be stupid to fall for such simple tricks, to which she replied, "They worked on you." FML
Today, I tried to get a funny reaction from my dogs with a fart, like I saw in a YouTube video. I shat my pants and the dogs didn't even notice. FML
Today, I was excited to teach my new puppy how to fetch. I threw the stick, and he just stared at it, then stared back at me with his tongue lolling out, as if to say, "You threw it. You go get it." I’ve now spent the past 30 minutes fetching my own stick, hoping he'd join in. Nope. FML
Today, I pretended to be dead in front of my dog to see what he would do. He started to hump me, and when I tried to get up, he growled at me until I got back down on the ground to wait until he was finished. FML
Today, I felt lousy and decided to give myself a pep-talk in the mirror. After a while, I cheered up and went about my day. I soon found out that my sister had recorded me through the crack of the door and posted the video on Facebook. I'm humiliated. FML
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Top comments
white16sox 19
Monkey see, monkey post on Facebook.
babegirlsweetiep 0
Try rolling again? Your dogs bound to get it sooner or later.
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Comments (119)
adorkable25 0
Let's see the video!!
EarAcheMyEYE10 2
Sweet
dansco 25
Good boy, do you want a scooby snack? lol
dansco 25
Good boy, do you want a scooby snack? lol
decidedlyvague 11
We roll when we want to roll. Deal with it.
Miguemex95 4
Your sister's ****** up...
BNightwolf 2
Go to facebook and add comment: "They see me rollin, they hatin".
RedPanda666 0
I wonder what dogs think of us when we act all retarted to them? Owner: WHOS A GOOD BOY!! WHOSE A GOOD BOY!!!!!!?!?!?!! Dog: if i had thumbs and longer fingers, i wuld pick up the phone, call 911, and get ur ass sent to a mental institution where they will wrap you up in a jacket and throw u into a padded room with only a yellow rubber duck to interact with.
auspicious 3
It sounds like the truth has been revealed! :D
rwq891 4
You are an idot. Your sister is brilliant.