Cpt Colin
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Get out of here
Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
ShayisPay101
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Life goals
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Anonymous
Clermont, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was given a lapdance by a pregnant stripper. FML
ChePow
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Grossed out
Today, a stripper came into my work to get some posters copied. She asked if she could pay in small bills. I just touched $50 that have probably rubbed up against a stripper's twat. FML
oops999
Downingtown, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Sounds hot
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Nice try
Today, my girlfriend of 4 weeks tried to use sex to manipulate me. After sex, I was blissful and half asleep, which is the time she chose to tell me she has some credit card debt and could I please help her pay it off. £27,000. Yeah, no. Don’t let the door hit you on the way back to the street. FML
asdfasdf
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Time is money
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Anonymous
Edison, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Finger wagging
Today, my normally-prudish girlfriend grabbed my crotch and said, "I want you to fuck me like I've never been fucked." I obliged. She loved it, until after we'd finished, when she decided that she felt "cheap, gross, and used" and started a huge fight. FML
Big B
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was at the strip club. I put my dollar on the stage. When the stripper came over to take it, she stood me up and flipped my tits and said I had bigger ones than her. I'm a guy. FML
Anonymous
Lemont, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML
Go away
Humboldt, United States
Today, after doing vigorous chores all day with my girlfriend, her mom came and paid us each $100. My girlfriend cried and threw a fit because she said they were her chores, so she deserves all the money. FML
Top comments
Garzoo 4
Wow. She's a keeper!
kut19 6
Too cheap to spring for the prostitute?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (78)
Okayitwasme 0
Look for a new girl! In the mean time enjoy the strip show.
meggy2010 5
Pocket the money and do without the sex!
MaxG123 8
Just say to her " We don't need to rush things, we can do whatever you are comfortable with".
aFreedom127 9
How much? Enough for a happy ending I hope.
russfml 31
Dump her
zoe768532 1
Well she was thinking of you what more do you want.
Ibeatmyself 3
marry her quick
SmittyJA24 26
She doesn't hate the idea is sex, per se; she hates the idea of sex with you.
simgar98 0
free stripper what sucks about that
hateevryone 15
dang, you might as well cheat on her if thats the case.