Today, my normally-prudish girlfriend grabbed my crotch and said, "I want you to fuck me like I've never been fucked." I obliged. She loved it, until after we'd finished, when she decided that she felt "cheap, gross, and used" and started a huge fight. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend screamed that I was a "filthy, sex-crazed pig-man" because I grabbed her ass. We were in her house, alone, and she was in the middle of giving me a long, deep kiss after I'd gotten off work. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, some filthy creep grabbed my girlfriend's ass in front of me. I smashed his face in, as would be expected. Afterwards, we had wild sex, then she cried, told me how frightened my "unprovoked violent response" made her, and kicked me out. I'm now in a seedy motel, wondering what the hell happened. FML
Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML
Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to bribe me to be good since we were going out to dinner with her parents by giving me a blowjob. The good news: it was one of the best she had ever given. The bad news: I came on her black dress. She responded by hitting in me in the nuts. Hard. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was sexually frustrated. Naturally, I started coming on to her, only for her to shove me away and snap that just because she was sexually frustrated, it didn't mean that she wanted sex. Huh? FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Thaylok 17
Ahh tye inner struggle of nature (hormones) versus nurture (the prudish upbringing). As she finishes her own journey you will see which wins out.
Wadlaen 24
Seems like you got ****** too...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (5)
Thaylok 17
Ahh tye inner struggle of nature (hormones) versus nurture (the prudish upbringing). As she finishes her own journey you will see which wins out.
Wadlaen 24
Seems like you got ****** too...
tiptoppc 21
Horniness is a very strong force and can override even the basic logical thinking including your own discretions. Some claim it’s why some “guys” can’t keep it in their pants. I find the same of females, but people do things in the pursuit of sex they wouldn’t be caught dead doing when even 2 brain cells couldn’t scream louder than the sex drive. You just figured this out. Congrats. It’ll happen again. Guys call it “post-nut clarity” as well.
Plcx 8
la donna è mobile…
TXdude4503 2
sounds like she’s a douche I’d leave her