Today, I found out that my six year-old cousin has a raging crush on my boyfriend. She lives across the street and watches from her window for his car to appear in front of my house. She's indicated that she'll stop at nothing until he's hers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, for the first time in my life, a girl has a crush on me. Too bad it's my co-worker's five year old granddaughter. FML
Today, I was telling my dad about how annoying it was to constantly have my ten-year-old cousin message me about her new boyfriend, when he suddenly bursts out laughing about how she can get a boyfriend at ten, and I have never even kissed a guy and I'm seventeen. FML
Today, I found out the guy i've been crushing on might be my cousin. Again. FML
Today, I found out that my seemingly innocent 80-something neighbor has been stalking every girl in the neighborhood, and considers me his girlfriend. FML
Today, my son told me he liked a girl, so I asked if they were friends. He said no, he's never spoken to her, but he watches her in class and follows her around. When I told him that was fucking creepy, my wife yelled at me. My kid is a stalker and my wife thinks it's cute. God help me. FML
Today, I asked the girl I like if she had her eye on anyone, subtly hinting that I wanted to date her. I sat there while she confessed her love for her cousin. FML
Today, I realized that I kinda have a crush on my sister-in-law. Mind you I'm a woman and her boyfriend of 5 years is my fiancé's brother. FML
Today, it marks the fourth month since my 15-year-old cousin asked me out, then started practically stalking me when I said no. It's also the fourth month of my parents and his constantly telling me to stop overreacting and that it's "just a phase." FML
Today, my little cousin, who just got a boyfriend, found out I've been single my whole life. She asked, "Is it because you're really ugly and awkward?" Yes. Yes, it is. FML
Today, I'm in a long-term relationship with a woman I love to bits, but I have a crush on a coworker. I've tried to brush it off, but it's only getting stronger. The worst part? I think she likes me too. FML
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Top comments
Lucia_Malpense 14
She's six, she'll get over it.
iRoc46n2 4
Does your boyfriend by chance have a sibling closer to her age? Maybe it would get her on a different course.
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Comments (99)
SneakyCaveman 13
Remind her that guys over the age of 8 have extra cooties. That'll keep her away.
HSOMGF 5
The real issue here is why OP feels so threatened by a six-year-old. Lame.
iiTzNeeNerz 26
Am I the only one that picture that crazy stalker girl with the big creepy eyes that seem to look deep into your soul? O_o
Tavers 19
And the poofy, frizzy, afro hair?
chelseaaababyyy 17
How is this an FML? I think it's kind of cute. Do you think a six year old is going to steal your boyfriend?
mollysticks 10
That's too cute.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Anybody else reminded of Sailor Moon?
KiRaKaT 9
I thought I was the only one :)
SwtCherryPie 26
I think thats kinda cute. Not sure why you feel threatened by a 6y-o tho.
clairelolz 5
ahh young love
Alpha2121 0
Shes six get over it!!! That's really cute by the way
anniekins 6
Or until someone bribes her with toys and candy. Don't worry, your boyfriend will soon be kid stalker free.