Today, I went through the car wash my boyfriend works at. When I pulled in, I explained I was Greg's girlfriend and cutely asked if I could get a free car wash. His co-worker looked at me confused and said, "Greg said he didn't have a girlfriend", then he looked at me and said, "Now I know why." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to my boyfriend's work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, "Just this fat chick I know." FML
Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by taking his new car to the automatic car wash. As soon as the water started, I realized that I forgot to close the sunroof. FML
Today, I worked a carwash as a fundraiser. Being nice, I figured I'd bring my car, get it washed, and donate some money. When it was my car's turn to be washed, everyone was conveniently busy washing other cars. My car was in front and needed to be washed and moved. I paid $10 to wash my own car. FML
Today, I wanted to give my car a quick wash, to get the salt and road grime off. My girlfriend lodged herself up my ass and decided that we should deep-clean all four of our cars, then screamed at me when I didn't show enough enthusiasm. FML
Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about how hard it is to wash long hair. While I was talking, he interrupted and said, "Wait, you actually wash your hair?" FML
Today, my boyfriend brought me to a restaurant on a surprise date. I guess he didn't know that my ex-boyfriend now works there, and that he would be our waiter for the evening. FML
Today, I was at the laundromat doing laundry with my mom when the guy running the place asked if we were "together". I thought this was just because of Covid and social distancing, but it turns out he thought my mom was my wife. FML
Today, I went to surprise my girlfriend, who was at work at Target, with flowers. I asked the employee at the entrance if she was there. When he asked who I was, his face lit up red and he started profusely apologizing, stating, “She told me you guys broke up.” before guiding me to her area. News to me. FML
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Top comments
TASagent 0
YDI for demanding a free car wash because you're boinking an employee. Talk about a sense of entitlement.
SS60 0
ouch, he's a dick. FYL
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Comments (78)
babysittingfail 0
You kind of deserve it for trying to get the free car wash but DUMP HIM he's an idiot!!!
MorF4RDK 8
Damm ;(
evan_7899 28
Wow, if your being kept a secret then there needs to be a talking
Tripitaka 21
That sure sucks... But than again, you got something much more valuable than free car wash
zykrithium 22
That's what you get... tryin ta be all cute nd shit...
fantasyworld 39
Why are you trying to get free stuff?
anon385 23
This is why i have lost faith in humanty. Not cuz of greg, he's an ass but w.e. You want a free car wash. You're his gf not the president
randybryant799 21
You cutely asked??