Today, I decided to confront my fear of birds when my friend's pet bird was walking up to me. He got on my arm, climbed up, and attacked my face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML
Today, I was designing a newspaper page with a story about an aggressive female bird that was defending its nest and attacking students near some stairs. In the article were photos of victims who were attacked. We had a good laugh over it. Later, I was walking past there and the bird attacked me. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. In his front room was a giant parrot. Hoping to impress them, I went over to the bird and began talking to it proving I wasn't scared. Out of nowhere, it's beak clenched onto my nose making it gush blood on the carpet. I was hospitalized. FML
Today, I was showing off my new pet bird to my friends over video chat. I opened the cage to demonstrate how friendly he was. Instead of perching on my finger like usual, he flew out the window. I spent the next hour chasing him around the neighborhood in my pajamas. FML
Today, a small fly was harassing my face, then it landed on a book next to me. I waved at it to make it leave, but it didn't. I got my fingers closer to it, to scare it off. Instead, it jumped on my finger as a playful parrot pet, spent a moment there, and flew off. I cannot even intimidate a fly. FML
Today, I was attacked by a bird at three in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and it decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML
Today, a bird crashed into my face. I didn't think that actually happened to people outside of cartoons. FML
Today, I was walking in the kitchen with my parrot on my shoulder and my dog running around. Something freaked out my bird and she bit my ear and started flapping her wings in my face. Surprised, I took a step back, tripped over my dog, fell, hit my head on the stove, and got knocked unconscious. FML
Today, I was driving my parrot home from the vet. As I was driving home, I decided to let her sit on my shoulder. Something scared her, and she started flapping in my face, causing me to crash my car into a tree. FML
Today, I tried to take a picture next to a peacock, but ended up running away with a face and mouth full of feathers. FML
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Top comments
jqmalang 17
"face your fears" they said. "you'll be stronger" they said.
yuno_gasai_fml 34
I hope you're ok op :)
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Comments (80)
Witchylady 18
Animals sense fear in a person. Next time open yourself up to a more loving energy and there will be no attacking in sight
SchelleForelle 18
Angry Bird? FYL
freehandjobs 6
They smell the fear lol
feven 32
You should've met my conure. He would have probably done that too. He only liked me. I miss him :(
abNormal62 23
Coming to a theatre near you...... Angry Birds the live action movie
thenewgirl29 20
I am scared of birds as well..
SookyLala 13
Did you freak out when it got close to tour face because the sudden movement might have frightened it, i dont see why it would climb up your face ro 'attack' you
Fuhkyoo 17
Apparently birds can smell fear, good to know.
MaevaloveUSA 6
and you had an attack because you weren't prepared to this...
ModernZelda 19
Animals can sense fear. But some birds are just assholes. Hope you're ok, OP.