Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML
Today, I found out that even though my boyfriend thinks that peeing on me in the shower is acceptable, he will still freak out and call me disgusting if I try to use the toilet while he's taking a shower. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend told me that he was going to pee on me to "mark his territory." When I told him that it was disgusting, he said, "last time, I just peed on you in the shower." FML
Today, my boyfriend learned about my filthy fetishes in the worst way possible. He found me naked in the bathroom, licking the dirty toilet seat. I couldn't even make an excuse. FML
Today, I drank from a soda can that was on my floor. Unfortunately, it was my boyfriend’s pee. He was too lazy to go to the bathroom. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend pees in the shower. This would've been OK if he was peeing into the drain. Instead, he pees on the shampoo and soap bottles. FML
Today, as I hadn’t showered yet, I told my boyfriend not to go down on me in case it smelled "down there." We started kissing instead, but he made a "blech" face, then went down on me anyway. Apparently my morning breath was worse than unwashed crotch. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
1awliet 8
He's obviously never heard of the 3 second rule.
MLK12345 4
So if you drop a skittle on the ground, and I manage to shit on it and pee on it in under 3 seconds, would you still eat it?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (194)
zach832 0
why are you in the shower? spray some perfume and get in the kitchen!
Miguemex95 4
5 second rule??
LucianDeSouza 4
Sounds to me you guys are a perfect match .
robokid777 4
thats disgusting F Y L
LukaInTheSky 3
Since no one's mentioned this yet I will - urine is sterile
5t3ff1k4h 45
I hope you were being sarcastic. There were at least 20 comments saying the same thing before you posted.
LukaInTheSky 3
O rly?
Iamkeaten 0
Everyone knows its impossible to e dirty in a shower. It's like aqua god mode
Robin132 3
at least you had showersex
Fruitmonster2 15
He has every right to say that. Why? because as someone else stated, urine is sterile (besides its JUST liquid toxins that your body doesn't need), therefore he has every right to think that eating a skittle off of the ground to be filthy.
5t3ff1k4h 45
Um, sure, but would you like to drink pee? Would you do it voluntarily? No? Didn't think so.
almir1987 0
Ughh peen on sum one daz nasty Lol really nasty lol wats his name R.KELLY
purplepanda805 0
That's hot, jk