Today, my son was planning on going clubbing. I disapproved, but no matter what I say he never listens, so I simply offered him some condoms so he doesn't end up knocking anyone up. He just said, "Nah, dad. Get 'em drunk enough and it's anal all the way." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, whilst celebrating my birthday with my friends and family, I met a girl at the bar who seemed interested. She became very disinterested and left after my mother whispered in her ear, "If you go home with my son, make sure he wears a condom." FML
Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML
Today, we discovered that our 14 year-old son is having sex. I was mad as hell at him, but by the end his dad completely took over the conversation, congratulated the hell out of him, and gave him money for condoms. If I wasn’t there, I genuinely think he would’ve asked our son for tips on infidelity. FML
Today, despite spending literal years educating my son about safe sex and warning him not to do something stupid like get a girl pregnant at 16, he actually surpassed my expectations. He got her pregnant at 17. Plus she gave him a nasty STD. FML
Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML
Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML
Today, my dad gave my younger brother condoms and a pat on the back, even though he doesn't have a girlfriend. This is after called me a whore after he saw me kissing my long-term boyfriend last week. FML
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML
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Top comments
TheGolfGTI 24
You need to have a serious talk. That is not okay.
MDoremis 38
You must be so proud.
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Comments (242)
pocketpixie90 6
so not ok.
tarlax 11
That's sick, is your son Alain4343?
ezrajab 22
Sounds like he would make anyone happy
Redgy22 26
Whoa, this went bad real fast.
MandieL 27
Comments keep disappearing from is thread...
mrpresident95 6
He isn't wrong.
gottageek 17
Sounds like a few STDs waiting to happen.
tinyalmeida 11
Wow, sounds like you need to teach him a lesson about respecting women. That's so sad and creepy.
arrowgold 19
Yeah, you should talk to him about consent.
wolf12king 12
I know this is bad but doesn't he know the difference between anal and babysitting.