Today, I drove a friend to the emergency room because he thought he had appendicitis. While sitting in the waiting room, I got puked on by a child. My friend's diagnosis? Gas. So he also farted all the way home. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I thought it would be funny to fart next to my brother in the car. Apparently, his carsickness is exacerbated by strong smells. I now know what it feels like to have lap full of vomit. FML
Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML
Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML
Today, I had the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my lower right abdomen. I was doubled over and vomiting it hurt so bad. After going to the E.R., thinking it was my appendix and getting checked in, I let out the biggest most rancid fart in my life and the pain immediately went away. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML
Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML
Today, my friend got drunk. He always pukes when he gets drunk, but I decided to drive him home anyway. He didn't puke the whole ride. We arrived at his house and he got out. Right as I was about to drive away he stumbled back to my car because he forgot his wallet. He grabbed it and puked on me. FML
Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML
Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML
Today, I was driving home from a friend's house after a night of partying. Suddenly, I had to poop worse than I ever had to in my entire life. The pain was so bad I had to pull over and pretend to be checking my tires while I let out the entire contents of my bowels onto the road. FML
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Top comments
lugnutz 0
pleasant sight to smell?
sweet_candy_ 17
Awwww you're a true friend op. I wish I had a friend like you :)
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Comments (87)
MlKAYLA 0
...Yup FYL.
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
learn to love the gas....
killjimmy 0
You didn't have to pay for it ya hoser.
iSnowboard 0
I guess you didn't have to "puts on glasses" pay for gas YEAHHHHHH!!
Rei_Ayanami 18
#51 They did actually, even though nothing was wrong they would still have to give a scan and other test before the could know for sure, and those can cost a pretty penny.
Rei_Ayanami 18
#51 They did actually, even though nothing was wrong they would still have to give a scan and other test before the could know for sure, and those can cost a pretty penny.
MEM0817 18
Not in Canada! Free health care there. They didn't have to pay shit.
SamBaBam98 0
#18 ur pic and username reminds me of in one of thr family guy episodes tht peter griffin tried to get meg to love the gas :)
DDPT2 4
Make him give that to gas to your car for driving him to the hospital.
sweet_candy_ 17
Awwww you're a true friend op. I wish I had a friend like you :)
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
GASP! bet you were aGASt with anger! did you stop for GAS to get some fresh air! Bet his bigGASs wasn't a pleasnt sight to smell!
lugnutz 0
pleasant sight to smell?
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
That's what I said.
nonigz 0
..
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
I don't think y'all are feeling the taste of my words correctly.
DoubleEdgedBlade 4
I smell what you did there!
DocBastard 40
Appendicitis? Never heard of it.
FYLDeep 26
Got Appendix?
ChibiChibi_fml 28
But have you heard of epityphlitis?
netherflame 0
No comprehendis. Sorry. Let's cut the latin for now. ; )
oliver86 8
Opening all the windows would work
Aerious 0
OP, if your friend had appendicitis they wouldn't be able to walk and they'd have a sharp pain in their side.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
That is not necessarily true that they wouldn't be able to walk. I've known several people who have had appendicitis who were walking around while they had it. One of them even drove themselves to the hospital because of the intense pain in their side.
Aerious 0
Oh, when I was thought to have had it I stopped at a doctor before going to the ER and they said it was hard to walk when you have it from the pain.
ChibiChibi_fml 28
It may be hard to walk because of the pain but that doesn't mean that people aren't able to. Plus there is the whole issue of different amounts of pain tolerance. There is actually a case where a man's appendix actually burst and he was still walking around and such for about three day before he finally collapsed.
Person1233 13
When I had appendicitis, I hardly had any pain. There was so little pain, I almost didn't go to the doctor to get it checked...
Aerious 0
I'm guessing since the OP's friend thought they had it - and because they ended up having gas - that they did have a pain in their side.
teaanddinosaurs 1
I had a grumbling appendix, and sometimes that felt like really bad gas...
georgiar0x 0
eew
StandardInsanity 1
It's not an FML for you if your car windows worked. =P
Chris19801012 0
No shit you ungrateful person. Atleast your friend is ok.