Today, I went to see a movie with the girl I've liked for months. After the commercials, she told me she had to go to the ladies room. She never came back. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to a movie and a dinner with a girl. During dinner, she excused herself to go to the bathroom, so I checked my social media feeds while waiting for her to return. She'd posted on her Twitter "Worst. Ever." I thought it was going well. FML
Today, I went to the movies with a girl I like, then we went to grab a bite afterwards. She spent most of the time telling me how much she dislikes my best friend because he hooked up with a new girl. I then found out the two had been "talking" for a while. FML
Today, I'd been talking to this girl for 3 months, and she finally agreed on a date. We got drinks and food, then she said, "I'm just going to the bathroom", then never came back, and blocked me. FML
Today, I was on a first date with a girl at the movies. Trying to be polite, I held in a fart until an intense, loud action scene came on. As soon as I let go, the scene went silent and my fart was clearly heard to everyone in the movie theatre. My date went to the bathroom. She didn't come back. FML
Today, I went to the cinema with a girl I like. Knowing she has a bit of a soft spot for me, I was keen to sit in the back row. Too bad her sister tagged along, insisted that we sit somewhere else, and scolded me every time I so much looked at her. I ended up paying for the unwanted guest as well. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I loved her. She left and never came back. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went to the cinema. Or rather, she went with her other boyfriend, and I happened to see them there. FML
Today, a girl I've liked for months agreed to go to a movie. We were going to see Captain Marvel, but missed the show time, so we saw Five Feet Apart. Blessing in disguise, right? Wrong. She cried while holding my hand as she talked about how in love she is with another girl. FML
Today, I went to the movies with some friends. During the movie, I really needed to pee but didn’t want to disturb anyone. So, I waited and waited. Finally, I couldn’t hold it anymore and bolted to the bathroom… only to get locked out of the theater in the process. The staff had to escort me back in during the end credits. FML
Today, the girl I've had a crush on decided she wanted to see a movie with me. I tried to hold her hand during the movie and it was great for about four minutes. Then she said, "Can I have my hand back?" FML
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Top comments
blueandred 0
My grandmother did this to someone once!
polico_wolf 0
"Today, I was with the boy i'd liked for months at the cinema, I went to the toilet for 5 minuites and when I came back, he was gone"
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Comments (94)
Viper_Revenge 10
Oh my god! ITS KANGAROO JACK ALL OVER AGAIN!
OtakuTaco 15
It was funny though.
LazyFlan 11
Did you get the picture tho?
noellebelle626 19
You my friend made my day by far
Viper_Revenge 10
Ita kangaroo jack all over again
sarahlwatson24 6
Omg. This is the funniest one I've ever read. ???
SexyQueen0905 24
Wait, I initially pictures this on a farm of some sort. You put your sunglasses on a random wild sheep in Ireland? Haha, did you at least get the picture?
VowelMovement 15
Did you get the picture though?
danman27 15
You get school trips to Ireland? Our only trip this year was going to the gym during third period.
TacoCat15 10
You are not a wise person.