Today, my girlfriend, whom I thought I would marry, broke up with me. She broke up with me because I don't believe the government controls the weather. Um, what? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she believes I "jinxed" her chances of getting the job she wanted. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me telling me I have problems communicating and that I didn't understand her. When I asked her why she didn't talk to me about this before she said "I didn't want to talk about it." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML
Today, my girlfriend left me because our "political views don't match" when I told her we needed to share house chores now that we live together. I know, I'm lost too. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after finding out my parents are divorced. Same reason my last three girlfriends broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Today, it was raining. I was out walking with my girlfriend, and decided it would be cute if we did a bit of dancing in the rain. As I was swinging her around, I swung her head against a lamp post. She broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that she wasn't really in love with me. She got that advice from an internet survey. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML
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Top comments
Sinshine 28
Congrats on dodging that before it got complicated.
shannon2348 14
and you want to marry an idiot like that? ydi
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Comments (14)
IshouldReallyBeS 19
Sounds like a lucky escape.
Rosemarie Townsend 13
Consider yourself lucky you got away from that
Jim Martin 7
I’m surprised that she hadn’t told you that the moon landing was faked, JFK was shot from the grassy knoll, there are aliens at Area 51, and make you wear an aluminum hat since the government also uses radio waves to control your mind.