Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when he finished, seemingly angry. He stood there naked complaining for 15 minutes about how our sex sucked. Then he demanded that I dress him, because "it's my fault his clothes were off in the first place". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he stopped and got dressed. Naked and confused, I figured he’d be right back. Yeah, 20 minutes later with a plate of food for himself. So much for sex. It would've been nice if he told me though. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he was horny. Since it has been a while, I offered to help. He sighed and complained that he didn't feel attractive and didn't want sex. I laughed and asked if he grew a vagina overnight. He got mad and stomped off. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and, in the heat of the moment, I cried out for him to go harder. He then had an exasperated expression on his face, and, in an adamantly offended tone, said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he left the room. FML
Today, things got heated with my boyfriend for the first time. Turns out he's even more inexperienced than I thought; when I started grinding against him, he frowned and said, "Um... why're you doing that? We've still got clothes on..." FML
Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said, "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML
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Top comments
daniisme 0
deuche much?
lynsieloowho 0
wow. kick him in the nards
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Comments (213)
fatalkiss 0
five year olds complain about sex? hmmm...
missvee98324 0
these ones are always funny
hate2love3434 0
snickerdoodles, to me you're like the Simon of FML's. Stop getting on this app and trying to ride on peoples lifes when you probobly can't take care of your own you bitch
picturescrazy 24
This was one of those rare gems that actually made me laugh out loud.
cuntwaffle 0
ew 5 years dont have sex! you ped-ah-phile!!
carolinacrown 0
lol whatah dick.
rachellinzay 0
what a dick
tokintot07 0
hahahahahaha. I just laughed. that's great
thetink 0
here is the problem: all hot guys are mean all nice guys are ulgy and all mice and hot guys are gay
DGross 8
#134 I was going to disagree with you but then I read: "and all mice and hot guys are gay" and starting laughing... best spelling mistake ever :-P oh yea... I still disagree with you... "hot" nice guys exist, they are just harder to find then most. Then again, I think it's equally hard to find a "hot" nice woman...so there :-P
BbYhRtLsS 0
Oh Woah! that's not always true. I've meet a lot of nice guys that were good looking and NOT gay. Most females just tend to go for the rebel guy and then complain about it.
trackrunner00008 0
I bet you did it too.