Today, it was my first day back to work since having my first baby. To show I'd caught up on everything, I had to give a presentation at the end of the day to the heads of my department. It went really well until the end, when one of them pointed out that breast milk had been leaking through my clothes the entire time. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, at work, I was taking a woman's measurements while she held her screaming baby. To silence the infant, she whipped out her breast right there and started feeding him. Moments later, he puked breast milk all over my desk. FML
Today, I was doing a big presentation at work and got nervous. My white shirt showed massive sweat stains in the most unfortunate places, including my lower stomach, making it look like I had peed myself standing up. FML
Today, was my first day at a new job. I was really pleased with how much positive attention I was getting in a mainly male office. Guess whose shirt was see-through. FML
Today, I woke up late for a very important presentation. I got dressed but forgot to wear a bra. During the presentation, I bent down to adjust a shoe strap. I rose to find that the thin straps of my blouse snapped and exposed my breasts. I gave a great presentation and a titty show. FML
Today, I got ready for work in the dark, and it was noon before someone told me that I had one of my wife's pantyliners stuck to the back of my pants. I'd just given a presentation to 80 people. FML
Today, I went to the store to get groceries. After getting all the stuff I need, and was heading towards the checkout point, I heard a baby cry and instantly felt coldness on my shirt. Yes I was lactating, and yes it was noticeable. FML
Today, after struggling with breastfeeding and trying to build up my milk supply, I was finally able to pump a full 6 oz! I celebrated by immediately spilling it all over my lap. FML
Today, I was the first one to wear the ugly corporate shirts we received. The people in my office, all of them guys, were all saying that it looked a lot better than they thought it would. Later that day I went to the toilet and saw that the shirt gapes open in front and you could see my boobs. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's to find out why I was producing small amounts of milky liquid from my nipples, even though I'm not pregnant. When she asked me to show her, I squirted on her shirt. FML
Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML
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Top comments
Efilyn 0
That's not your fault. At least you presented well.
hashmita 0
That's pretty embarrassing, even though it's not your fault.
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Comments (96)
Tancaliel 12
Actually, aside from the whole leakage issue, what surprised me the most about your story is that you've just returned from 16 weeks of maternity leave... (or at least that's the standard over here, dunno about the UK) And your bosses expect you to be so caught up on everything that happened at your office over the past *sixteen weeks* by the end of your first day back, that you have to give a full presentation on it? FYL just for that, OP. :P
Pennygrim 0
Red cabbage leaves and menthol rub with camphor in it. Dries up your milk faster than anything :)
emjay09 0
that sucks!!
88FML88 0
idiots
princess711 0
you can't control it.. it's embaressing but isn't your fault! you'll learn ways around it- maybe wear those padding things or something- and bring a spare shirt?
kizzck 6
FYL
jalapeno64 10
That's hot
pvtmeives 4
Hey don't feel embarrassed. You just had a baby lactating is a natural thing for a woman.
imperialtl 12
Don't worry about it. Shit happens.
Oxidation 5
Curious as to why they happened to feel the need to point that out. But still, congrats on the new baby!