Today, at work, I was taking a woman's measurements while she held her screaming baby. To silence the infant, she whipped out her breast right there and started feeding him. Moments later, he puked breast milk all over my desk. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Not cool
Today, a woman started breastfeeding her infant in a restaurant. Disgusted, I told her to take it to the bathroom, as I was eating. In response, she squirted me with milk then went back to ignoring me. FML
Oh, hello…
Today, I left something in my boss's office. The door was closed which usually means she isn't in there, so I asked her coworker/friend for the key. When I opened the door, she screamed at me to get out of there. Turns out, she has just stopped breastfeeding her son and was pumping her breasts. FML
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Today, I got screamed at by a woman at work for feeding her 3-week-old infant formula instead of the bottled Kool-Aid that she packed. FML
Damp patch
Today, it was my first day back to work since having my first baby. To show I'd caught up on everything, I had to give a presentation at the end of the day to the heads of my department. It went really well until the end, when one of them pointed out that breast milk had been leaking through my clothes the entire time. FML
Today, I was waitressing at work, when a woman decided to change her baby's nappy on a table. One moment I was asking her to leave, and the next, she was shoving a fully shat-out nappy into my hands. She asked me to get rid of it and fetch her baby wipes. FML
Classic mistake
Today, after I finished giving my baby a bottle then burping her, I lifted her up and was bringing her in for kisses. As I was doing this, I felt this warm liquid hit my lips and slide into my mouth. I instantly pulled her back and she'd vomited. It took everything out of me not to vomit myself. FML
Today, a mother and son were in my office. The kid wasn't feeling well and threw up. Mom covered his mouth with her hand, creating a vomit nozzle and covering me in puke. She yelled that I deserved to be sprayed on because I was not quick enough in getting a bucket for her son. FML
Today, I was at work and a lady came in with a cake - I work as a nurse in a pediatrics ward. While we were eating the cake, she told us she used her breast milk instead of normal milk. Now all of us nurses have to be tested. FML
Bittie
Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML
Top comments
laaryssa 21
I'm all for public breastfeeding, it's not sexual or anything but that was te wrong place and wrong time
happle 21
Have you never been around an infant before? Mothers breast feed their children; it's a part of life. In addition, infants have little to no control over what comes out o their bodies, so I'm certain the mother could have done nothing to stop it.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (250)
anjila77 6
Ugh! That sucks, sorry to hear that
JustinKirby 20
Well actually it sucked at first, than it blew chunks on OP's desk so I guess the correct term would be "that blows".
ryanthecheeseguy 18
Your a ******* idiot. Just titting!
ryanthecheeseguy 18
I just down voted my own comment.
Arrow44 10
Hey Ryan, lets just stop commenting today.
ohgeejosee 19
I can understand being upset about the infant barfing on your desk... But how in the world is it f your life because she was breast feeding her child. Maybe the infant was hungry, and running on strict feeding schedules is difficult with children so you do what you can. Obviously she was ill prepared not being covered up, but still. She probably already felt bad about it, so I don't think it's f your life at all:P
hienzburgess 9
some people find that it should be a private thing or just awkward.
Zebediabolical 45
It's been a completely natural thing for hundreds and thousands of years. Anyone who thinks it's awkward or should be a private thing should get up and leave themselves.
countryrose92 23
Breast feeding is natural and if OP felt awkward could have simply asked if she had a cover or a blanket available. It's her right to feed her child. I know first hand how embarrassing it is I have a screaming infant in a college interview, or in a clothing section in walmart, or at a doctors appointment and I feel bad because people are staring at me, glaring at me, as though I am a horrible mother because I am allowing my child to scream in a store, but at the same time I cannot just "whip my breast out" to feed him because people will look badly at me for that as well. What am I to do? Allow my child to scream and cry because his tummy is writhing in pain from hunger, or make people feel awkward by "whipping out my breast" so I can feed my baby? Breast milk is better for my child than formula and it is my choice what to feed my child, why should I be criticized for that? Also, formula causes infants to spit up more often then breast milk and that is not something the mother could control. So, I ask the op, what would you suggest the mother do differently? Not feed her child and allow them to scream from hunger? Or feed the child so the child stops screaming. And hopefully she cleaned up the mess her baby made otherwise yea, FUL for having to clean up baby spit up. *end rant *
grayeyedmarine 14
why does breastfeeding mom need to cover up
Shade1982 21
Sooo... I should get up and leave my OWN place of work, so someone else who has come in as a guest (because you may be a customer, but you are still a guest in my store) believes we still live in the Stone Age? I don't care about public breastfeeding, for all I care you run around topless and start dancing on a pole in the middle of the street, I really don't care. But I am getting tired of these pre-medieval BS arguments... There is a time and a place for everything and we have this thing called common decency, and she could have just taking a moment for herself to do this. Can I just whip my dick out to pee on the street anywhere I want? Why not, isn't this also a natural thing?
raspygirl 12
Did you honestly compare going to the washroom in public to feeding a child?? Do you really believe it's rude to feed a child in public? Do you eat in public? Feeding a baby is just that feeding a baby. It has nothing to do with common decency. Does a breast really make you that uncomfortable? There are so many things wrong with your comment, and way of thinking. You are a very ignorant person if you think feeding a baby without a cover is Stone Age!! You don't have to leave your work, just continue to do your job, like OP did. So the baby spit up, ya that sucks but honestly big deal
Ravensmoon666 19
Okay look, if women want to breast feed in there own home that's fine. But I don't want some woman whipping out her **** to feed a baby. Get a bottle and use formula. Font ruin my appetite at a restraunt or my time shopping or whatever just because you don't have common decency enough to save that stuff for home. And don't pull that "it's natural " crap on me. It was food for an infant when times are tough and before we had formula and/ or processed baby food. We have it know, we're not in a time where you HAVE to breast feed. Keep it at home. (coming from a mother who doesn't and never Will breast feed )
meliadams 12
How dare you tell a woman to use formula if she chooses to breast feed! BREAST MILK IS SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN TO BE BETTER FOR THE CHILD! Breast milk was for when we didn't have processed baby food?!? Are you freaking kidding me?!? Don't open your mouth if you're going to spew idiocy.
jesustitts 20
Some of these comments are so ignorant it worries me what their children are being taught! I will not let my son scream bloody murder in the middle of Walmart when he needs to nurse. Breastmilk is the best nutrition for baby. If a mom chooses to breastfeed her baby why the hell should she formula feed in public to make you comfortable? What about her child's needs? If a woman's breast feeding a baby-which is what breasts are made for and not just a place holder for feeding until "processed foods and formula" were created-than maybe you should reconsider some things in life. I've never heard someone tell a woman with half her ass hanging from short shorts and her ******* popping over the top of her shirt that she's doing anything wrong. Maybe I don't want to see that. And you know what I do when I see it? I LOOK AWAY and go about my business. If a mom is publicly breastfeeding I will tell her what a great job she's doing and make sure she knows what she's doing is right. Formula was created for convenience as well as for women who medically can not breastfeed. While that's rare it does happen and formula is a lifesaver, but will never be able to replicate breastmilk. Feed your baby how you see fit but don't sit there and tell a mom to cover unless you're going to cover your head, yes have some decency when you NIP but a huge blanket brings more attention than a baby eating while a mom barely brings out her breast, there are ways to discreetly breastfeed with no cover. Some of you need to stop being so ignorant before you begin commenting on this topic.
nix1993 41
FOR ***** SAKE, THIS IS NOT A 'BREAST IS BEST' RALLY. To be perfectly honest, i'm not comfortable with breastfeeding in public, for myself, and because I know it makes others uncomfortable, which is FAIR ENOUGH. You can't control what makes someone uncomfortable and it isn't fair to shove it in their face when they just want to eat their lunch. It's not that damn hard to use a pump and feed breast milk from a bottle. I know at least 4 other moms that admit they only breastfeed in public to 'make a statement' that it should be acceptable, and it drives me crazy because 2 of them used to be made uncomfortable by the very same thing before they had children. It's selfish, the least people can do is have a bit of respect for other people. You would NOT whip your breast out in public if you didn't have a child, because you wouldn't be comfortable doing so, and you know it would make others uncomfortable, so why is it so different when there's a child attached? I mean, by all means if you use a blanket like a lot of women, good on you and continue, but the people that do blatantly parade it as if they are daring someone to be awkward about it are wrong and petty, it's not fair and you aren't the only person that matters, you're feelings and opinions on such aren't suddenly more important because you're the one with the baby.
jesustitts 20
I'm not concerned with anyone's feelings but my sons when I nurse in public. It is COMPLETELY different when you're feeding a baby rather than flopping your ******* out to show them off. One is trashy and sexual. One is nourishing. I'd rather my son be happy and comfortable and include him when we go out rather than him scream to be fed and have his feelings hurt and his belly hurt. My son is my first priority not someone else's feelings especially when they can simply avert their eyes. Don't like it don't look.
snugglesMcGee199 23
I feel uncomfortable when I'm walking down the street and I see a guy reach down and scratch/adjust his nether-regions, or when a couple, gay or straight, is making out. However, I don't tell them to stop, just because I feel uncomfortable. If I'm uncomfortable, I leave or I look away. Easy as pie.
addioty 19
I don't care if you breastfeed or not, but taking tit out at a WORKPLACE is just rude. There's a bathroom, you can get a blanket, or even just a warning, but no one wants to see your ****. Of course it's natural, but it's disrespectful to just whip your tit out suprisingly. I don't care if you do it in public, just a little warning would be nice and courteous.
bfsd42 20
People, the fml here is not really about the breast feeding. It is the fact that the woman expected op to take her measurements while she was dealing with a hungry baby.
katie1989 9
How would you like to eat in the bathroom or with a blanket over your head? Yeah you probably dont. You also see more **** at la senza.
squideth 18
You can all thank society's over-sexualization of women's bodies resulting in people being "uncomfortable" with women using their breasts for what they're naturally made for.
ZombieSazza 34
Why the **** didn't you tell her here the bathroom was before it got to the puking stage? When someone is that much of a hassle just get rid of them ASAP.
happle 21
Have you never been around an infant before? Mothers breast feed their children; it's a part of life. In addition, infants have little to no control over what comes out o their bodies, so I'm certain the mother could have done nothing to stop it.
AshesNicole623 17
Next time you can go eat in a bathroom, ya nasty.
coried91 28
Babies have a tendency to just spit up without warning. You can't say that you never puked before you reached a bathroom before. When you were a baby you probably Spit up in public areas too.
AshesNicole623 17
Babies have zero control over things. This includes getting hungry and puking.
ElizabethNL93 20
Because OP and the mother knew that the baby was going to puke Please do not be so ignorant, 2.
Lemon_Baby_2013 6
just an FYI its illegal to breast feed a baby in a bathroom. Its illegal to feed any thing to any child in a bathroom.
JamieBue38 5
I can't handle the ignorance. As a nursing mom, yes, I breastfeed in private, but feeding your baby from the mom's boob is pretty frickin natural. Society has sexualized boobs, I see it as feeding my baby. And by the way, breastfeeding is HARD so you should applaud women who can nurse. Not every mom CAN do it.
rhcpgurl 18
She could have packed a bottle.
mamaflower 23
Some babies refuse the bottle
caro1ina48 13
Would you want to eat in the bathroom? I don't think so!
ElizabethNL93 20
68 - My daughter refused a bottle until she was two months old. I know another girl whose daughter didn't take a bottle until she was 11 months old. Also, some moms simply may not prefer or be able to pump.
KawaiiCupcake 14
#68 that's lazy and cheap!
stretchedthin 20
As a woman who nurses her daughter in public you can kiss my ass on me nursing in a dirty disgusting bathroom. How about you go then to eat your lunch and then tell me it's ok or when you have to shop yeah I nurse and shop at the same time just because I have a baby I refused to be shamed into hiding a beautiful and natural bonding experience that is the most nutritious and healthy thing to feed an infant. I bet you wouldn't have a problem if a woman just pulled out her breast as long as there wasn't a baby you dick.
doodlecloud 27
28, 111 - I have no problem with public breast feeding, however wouldn't it get in the way if you were getting measurements taken? Would probably have just dragged it out longer and included much adjusting which wouldn't have been nice for baby. So I think in this instance it would have been better if baby had just waited. Or if they still had a lot left to do, she could have politely said that she'd need to take a time out and let OP get on with other jobs whilst she feeds in peace.
countryrose92 23
33, I love your comment. You're right, feeding a baby in a bathroom stall is the exact same as taking your bag lunch in there and eating a sandwich while sitting on the pot. If you wouldn't do it why should that infant have to?
grayeyedmarine 14
no. your ignorance is sad
ElizabethNL93 20
105, how is packing a bottle lazy and cheap? When we are on lengthy public outings, I pack a bottle for my daughter. I pump. So it doesn't necessarily have to be a formula-filled bottle if that is what you are thinking.
Parkour_rocks 20
I think #125 suggested the best and most courteous way in which the mother could have handled it. No problems for anyone there. Good job #125.
Jupsi_fml 12
By the way, we choose breastfeeding also because it makes life easier. Why on earth would you : - pump your milk (not the best moment of your life, believe me, with all stupid jokes about cows and milking, plus it's not precisely pleasant) - clean a bottle - keep it cold during handling - find a place where you can warm it - jeopardize your breastfeeding (because when you do that, breast is not stimulated the same way, and baby can mix teat and nipple and forget how to suckle) - do the dishes later ......... When you have it all ready, at the right temperature, everywhere you go, in your breast ? All this just because some ******* selfish ignorant jerks can't stand to see a breast ? In a society that shows breast all the time ? The world is getting crazy !
jesustitts 20
#174 because why should we do what our bodies are meant to do? When we can waste our time finding the right pump, which cost loads of money, then you have to buy a bottle, or 2. Or 200, because face it, babies don't all take the same man made bottle nipple. Then we can begin pumping and attempting to simulate the same suckling a baby does just to produce small amounts of milk, but a bottle warmer, then while baby has been screaming bloody murder for the past 30 minutes while pumping we can take gassy pissed off baby, shove something unfamiliar in their mouths, all while our breasts begin spewing milk at the sounds of baby crying, while baby guzzles down the bottle, realizes it's faster and than denies breast, milk supply diminishes and suddenly it's harder than it should be. All because some sick individual thinks there's something wrong with nursing a baby in public, but not with a woman in a too small outfit letting her boobs fall out. Showing more boob and nipple than any breastfeeding mom.
shortasalways 9
Im a breastfeeding mom and hardly use the bottle but have brought one for situations like this in case my husband is with me and wants to help. According to Medela, La Leche League,Dr.Sears and Kelly mom you can leave breastmilk can at room temp for 8 hours. So you would not have to "keep it cold" and try to warm it up.I think the better response would have been for the mom to excuse herself, feed the baby, then start her measurements again. If I knew I was going somewhere specfic like a fitting I personally feed my baby before going inside.It makes it a more enjoyable experience for mom and baby.
jesustitts 20
187, I agree. She could have fed baby before but we don't know the moms side of the story. What if momma had been there for a couple hours, babies breastfeed often, as you know. If I'm making a trip anywhere I always feed my son before we leave and before we go in, there's certain circumstances where he gets hungry after 2 hours of shopping and baby's got eat!
shortasalways 9
I would have still excused myself.Having a nursing baby in your arms would make it harder to be measured.
jesustitts 20
#242.. I'm just imagining OP saying ma'am I need to measure your bust, the lady removing her infant and OP being sprayed with boobie milk.. I agree, she could have excused herself as she was clearly getting measurements, baby can't be expected to wait or eat in a bathroom as others have somehow justified in their brains, but she could have said, "excuse me please, I need to feed my baby, do you mind if I feed in here" and OP would have then been able to excuse herself to give mom privacy or just averted her eyes while taking a break, if need be.
a17eathshot1 11
lammereeee
firefighter925 18
The baby was just tryin to share with you lol
RodzillaX 30
Baby was just trying to share is all.
lengi123 18
Too little too late
RodzillaX 30
Story of my life.
Vagitarian1 10
I'll bet tit smelled bad.
RodzillaX 30
Don't be such a boob.
RosaEP517 13
actually breastfed babies spit up is not nearly as bad as formula fed.
laaryssa 21
I'm all for public breastfeeding, it's not sexual or anything but that was te wrong place and wrong time
CocaColaPepsi 13
I think its inappropriate, what if young kids see it? they shouldn't be seeing a women's breast unless they're the bonds being breast fed
repKyle95 24
So only if they're British Secret Service?
rocker_chick105 31
15- as if they will never see one in their life again. Being a mom is difficult job
ShyAnn29 15
I think moms should be able to breastfeed where ever, and whenever they need to!
coried91 28
So a young kid shouldn't see a mother nourishing her child? I don't like it when a women just completely exposes herself when she's feeding her child but to say young kids shouldn't look is stupid. You can easily turn the experience into a lesson on how to take care of a child. I do agree that she should have been more considerate of how the OP felt.
happle 21
I agree with 25. A baby's needs shouldn't be put on the back burner just because someone can't handle a boob.
anne1_fml 13
So it's okay for girls to wear revealing clothing but not okay for a mom to breast feed? When you see WAY less because the baby is covering up the majority of the boob.
sourgirl101 29
I used to nurse my daughter in public. Ex: walk the mall. However, no one ever saw my breasts. They have sheer cool blankets that I would use as a cover up. To the untrained eye, it looked like I was just putting my child to sleep underneath. If I went to the restroom etc... Every time my baby was hungry, I'd have spend half my life in there (plus I hate nasty dirty restrooms!!) I'm 100% for nursing your child in public but know first hand it can be done discreetly. I did it that way for 11 months.
coried91 28
Okay, go eat in the bathroom and tell me that it doesn't gross you out . Babies immune systems are very weak and bathrooms are absolutely nasty. Especially public ones. I would rather embarrass myself by showing strangers my chest than feed my children in a ******* bathroom.
ElizabethNL93 20
As a breastfeeding mom, it is nice to know that there are people out there who support feeding a child in public. Although I pump milk for when we go out, I have no problem with mothers who publicly feed. But I do agree that maybe it could have been done a bit more discreetly. I probably would've done the same thing if my daughter was screaming - I would have a blanket on hand to cover me just in case.
iluvpeanutbutter 22
I don't get why 43 was downvoted. He/she isn't saying never breastfeed, or denigrating breastfeeding mothers, just that it would be more appropriate to cover up beforehand. I'm all for breastfeeding, but last weekend, I was at a cafe at a communal table and the woman opposite me literally flopped her breast onto the table before picking it up to feed her baby. True story. Put me right off my eggs.
NotoriousLES 14
If you are in public, there is no such thing as "an invasion of your personal space" except your own body. If you don't like what someone else in the public space is doing, like feeding an infant, you have the option not to look.
iluvpeanutbutter 22
That's a great excuse for flashers, as well.
KawaiiCupcake 14
I been waiting for this one!! First, it's such a shame that society sees breast as a sexual body part. It's not. It's for breast feeding! Why do you think boobs increase during pregnancy! Woman should have the right to do this in public because THAT IS THE POINT OF BOOBS!! In Africa, for example, grown woman walk around naked breast freeing and no one shames her. Nor do male get boners when they see them! It's perfectly natural! OP is one of those people don't understand! A real woman should BREASTFEED if she knows what's good for her child! The baby grows up to be healthier and smarter (this is proven!!) and kids SHOULD see this! This how stuff really is! This is the purpose of boobs! Little kids should KNOW this!
KawaiiCupcake 14
To educate you all here is a great website! This will give guys some knowledge about breast and girls as well! http://www.007b.com/breastfeeding_sexual.php
Savner 16
I think it's fine for women to breast feed in public, but they should be tasteful about it. Whether it's natural or not, many people still feel pretty uncomfortable with it in public.
laaryssa 21
A women breastfeeding is natural. If kids see they will grow up thinking its normal, besides they're kids. They may have been breastfeeding not long ago.
Dynosaur_dollie 38
89 not all mother's can breastfeed. my oldest was not breastfeed, it wasn't something that was going to work for us at that time. My youngest is breastfeed. It doesn't make someone any less of mother if it doesn't work for them breastfeeding is ******* hard and not always does it work. That doesn't mean my older son is going to grow up unhealthy and stupid compared to my younger one. personally the fact that so many people think a bathroom is an appropriate place to nurse disgusts me. I don't even like using public washrooms to go bathroom why on earth would I feed my child there? My child hates being covered and pulls the clothes down fuses etc... it's more distracting having him fuss that way than have him nurse uncovered. I do use nursing rooms if it's convenient, if not stop looking at my chest and you won't see me breastfeeding.
000lizzy000 13
Its horrible that people still expect mothers to feed their infants in germ filled washrooms. OP didn't state babys age but the younger they are the more often they feed. Some just can't wait. And I dont believe the mom just "whipped" it out. I've never wittnessed any bfing mom do that so abruptly with someone they don't know. I bf in public doesn't matter where but I do try to time feeds around our outings to avoid that
ElizabethNL93 20
89, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you meant "all mothers who CAN should breast feed." Otherwise, I have to agree with 128 - just because someone cannot breast feed does not make that individual stupid or unfit. And I'm sure that children who eat formula or alternative food grow up perfectly healthy. I think that the way you put it may be slightly offensive to a some people. Because like others have said: breast feeding is hard, and it does not always go smoothly, regardless of whatever you've heard elsewhere.
Parkour_rocks 20
#16 I do not get what you meant by your comment. Could you please elaborate?
Mossears133 15
Young child sees boob: "What's that?" "That's a boob, it's for feeding babies." You see boob (and aren't comfortable with it): LOOK THE OTHER ******* WAY
Sputnikspak 13
I'm glad that a lot of malls and stores up here have set up rooms specifically for nursing mothers if they want privacy. I have absolutely nothing against public breast feeding, it doesn't bother me one whit, but I know that personally, I'd find it difficult to breast feed in the middle of a food court with the inevitable stares from people who don't get it. But I think OP is in the wrong, here. It sucks that the baby barfed on your station, hopefully she offered to clean it up. If not, THERE'S your FML.
TheDrifter 24
The food court, the perfect spot in the mall to breast feed. The baby eats where everyone else eats :)
bananawatson 1
have you seen most teenagers nowadays? they basically have their boobs hanging out..
jessakaye95 5
What is wrong with children seeing breasts? I'm not pro public nudity but goodness! It's just a part of the female body. What's so sexual about a baby being fed?
katie1989 9
What IF young kids see it? "Mommy wants that lady doing?" "shes feeding her baby". End of discussion. Way to teach your kids that the human body is to be covered up and sexualized
JustinKirby 20
Did you hear about the woman with wooden breast implants! The baby would be getting splinters wooden tit?
mfayem 15
My IQ dropped just from reading this.
platypus546 24
Dad, go home, you're drunk.
krakhd 15
really lame
auro7 18
That actually *sucks*.
HortonThelephant 15
A mammary that will be shared with the grandchildren, to be sure.