Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, thirty minutes after the end of a great date with a great girl, she texted me, "Yeah, uh, never come near me again." FML
Today, I finally got a date with one of the hottest girls in school, a perfect 10. Just before I go to pick her up to go to the movies, I called her to find out where she lives. She answered the phone, only to hear my father yelling in the background, "STOP TALKING TO THAT WHORE." FML
Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend of two years expressing my feelings for her. She responded with, "I'm going to bed." FML
Today, I got a text from my ex-boyfriend that said, "I love you." Thinking this meant he'd changed his mind about breaking up with me less than 24 hours before, I replied back excitedly. Turns out that was a text sent last weekend that didn't go through until now. What great timing. FML
Today, my friends and I went out drinking, and luckily enough, the guy I have had a crush on for four years now was there. I tried to get drunk so that I can make a move and blame it on the alcohol. I went in to whisper my confession in his ear... only to puke on him. FML
Today, I went on my first date in months. My mum had invited friends over, and when I told them I was going out on a date, my mum said "No you're not, don't lie. Who would go out with you?" FML
Today, while sitting next to me, my boyfriend sent a text to one of his "friends" saying, "I'm thinking of you." FML
Today, I woke up to a broken car window and a text from my ex that read, "Before you ask me, the answer is yes." FML
Today, a guy asked for my number at a party. As I was entering my number into his phone, my name and a picture of me popped up. I'm afraid I just met my stalker. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I had been talking to online for weeks. When I showed up, he looked nothing like his profile picture, and he spent the entire time talking about his ex-girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
808Boyo 4
You should have said, “Nah, I just stopped by to say **** you! "
boomsl4ng 11
Thats really mean tbh! What an idiot! But why didnt u text her back asking where would u go and stuff? Fyl
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Comments (84)
yaoifreak 8
Cold blooded female !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ugh
sexyrocker63 0
What a **** u got it boy ur to good for her prob anyways
MrsCunny 1
XD omg I love u. U sound just like my friend
BradleysMommie 0
Ouch! I'm sorry:( what a stupid bitch(: but I think she dud that on purpose so don't show her it bothered you act like it never happened.
Supahotfire222 0
U should of gone: oops must be the wrong house... Cuz ur not my hot date for tonight... Then walk out like a boss and hit the club pick up a real girl not this **** :)
fantasyworld 39
You don't deserve her.