Username
United States
Creepy
Today, my roommate informed me that one of her scorpions is loose in our apartment again. Great. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
Today, my roomate informed me that her snake was missing in our apartment again. Apparently, I need to be careful because the snake's attracted to blood. I'm on my period. FML
Justin
Awwww, how sweet!
Today, after having a 3-day vacation and feeling a bit bummed that it was over, I got home to find a black widow watching her babies hatch in my office window. FML
sting
Valencia, United States
Today, I broke a glass case containing my pet scorpions. I still can't find them. FML
MyNameIsNotJeff
United States
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
Anonymous
I'm outta here
Today, my boyfriend's recently mated tarantula disappeared from her enclosure with her egg sac, so she's now somewhere in the house with between 20 and 100 babies hatching within a week. I moved out this afternoon. My boyfriend caused this, he can damn well find her before I set foot in there again. FML
Boyufd
Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
NotSpiderman
Edinburg, United States
Today, I discovered a brown recluse spider in my house. Before I could smash it, it escaped under the door. Now I'm freaked out and wearing boots and gloves, clutching at my kittens and waiting for it to appear. My dad laughs everytime he walks past. FML
QWERTY
Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML
cricketsins
United States
Today, my sister told me she found my escaped tarantula and put it in a box on my bed. I never had a tarantula, and the box was empty when I checked. FML
mac
Bankstown, Australia
Today, my roommate showed me a video of a cockroach crawling all over my face while I was asleep in the lounge. FML
Top comments
Calen5556 0
In Texas we have those all the time. Had one in my bathroom this morning.
Ferretface 13
40- I'm closer to the appetizer portion of Texas myself.
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Comments (123)
brianjman14 23
Shit. I'd be so scared to just be there. I probably wouldn't come back until she found the scorpion.
perdix 31
Did it rock you like a hurricane? What kind of lease agreement lets you keep aging German rockers as pets? My apartment building only allows us to keep aging French ******, but only with a $500 syphilis deposit.
ikickgingers 15
I was trying to work in winds of change but couldn't. Pdix, ftw.
Ray_of_midnight 23
Came here to say this. You win one internets for today
Zaffro 8
Pour alcohol on them anything 40% up should do the trick. They sting themselves to death.
JubJub1991 4
Same deal in NC
ikickgingers 15
When my dad was stationed in Texas they were everywhere, sometimes they'd hide in his pack :/ this is why I love ny and it's nine months of winter.
uKNOuLOVEit 0
lucky you
scuba113 2
Hahaha that's funny I just lost one of my tarantulas this morning too and still can't find it
AShadowSoul 1
Badass girl
jake3292 5
Again?
corje20 0
the bigger the better small ones r more dangerous than the larger ones but still b careful.