Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom went to the store. She said she was feeling generous, and had gotten everyone a little treat. My brothers each got candy and a movie. I got acne medication. FML
Today, I bought fifteen bags of candy for the trick-or-treaters. I sat outside with a bowl of candy the whole night. Only one person came. FML
Today, I had to tell all the trick-or-treaters that I'd run out of candy. I'd actually bought about $50 worth of candy, but managed to eat all of it by myself, sitting alone in my apartment, exactly like last year. FML
Today, a kid came Trick-or-Treating at my house. When I told her it was still one more day until Halloween, and that I didn't have any candy, she wound-up her fist, punched me in the groin, and ran off laughing. FML
Today, after a stressful shift at work, I bought three bags of candy to hand out to trick-or-treaters tonight. I didn’t realize until I got home that one bag had a hole in it, and there were three empty M&M wrappers inside. My grocery store sucks. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend to get a bunch of candy for our first Halloween at our new house, so she got $60 worth. We got into an argument about who was going to give it out. It’s now 9 p.m. No one came to our door all night. FML
Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML
Today, I found out my whole family has been mistakenly using the same toothbrush for over a month. FML
Today, I stayed over at my grandparents' house. I woke up and had to brush my teeth. My grandma asked if I had found a toothbrush to use. I told her that I used my old purple toothbrush. She told me that was the toothbrush she used to brush her toenails. FML
Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML
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Top comments
UnidentifiedFun 37
I've heard of apples and granola bars, but toothbrushes are the next level!
gurbism 16
No one egged your house?
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Comments (88)
UnidentifiedFun 37
I've heard of apples and granola bars, but toothbrushes are the next level!
OysterPearls 33
I would rather have gotten a toothbrush than a "magic rock", AKA a marble covered in glitter.
gurbism 16
Candy with bible verses taped to it is not uncommon in my neck of the woods
cjwayy 22
My dentist is my neighbor, and he handed out toothbrushes as well as candy.
badluckalex 23
I used to get silly string and king size candy bars where are you guys trick or treating?!
FmyL6 19
I got ******* bread for Halloween this year...
tobedd 13
Better toothbrushes than apples with razor blades
Charlie_Brown_ 1
I always get rocks :/
MzZombicidal 36
If I was a dentist, I'd give out tons of candy! More work for me! >:)
amayasoma 19
Lady handed out anti circumcision cards to the kids...
Bmf2000 12
Thats... kinda bad.
incoherentrmblr 22
This FML is approved by the American Dental Association...
Ltsdragons 19
There was this house that handed out bibles, and another that handed out oatmeal, and another that handed out stuffed animals in my neighborhood
Toriahh 21
Maybe your mom doesn't want the kids to get cavities!
sayyestothedress 24
Op's mom is cheap, she's making them the cheap house
IMcPwn 12
How are toothbrushes cheaper than candy?
sayyestothedress 24
#50 I'm guessing that you live in the same neighbourhood as OP
narwhalicious 15
At least you're encouraging dental hygiene.
OysterPearls 33
And vandalism.
kipperin 18
And pain...emotional pain.
so_smooth 13
What's next, books?
NeatNit 33
oh shit
HappyItalian 38
Do you know how expensive books are? I'd like that actually (Unless they suck).
vanessa_tranz 15
In my neighbourhood, apparently there was a house handing out books and pens. xD
jbombdighetty 11
Why all the down votes? this was genius xD
forsaken_ones 9
Does it come with free toothpaste?
Xivion 19
That's the next house down the street a little...
Marie54321 19
My mom wanted to handout travel sized toothpastes but I stopped her from buying them and made her buy candy instead
gurbism 16
No one egged your house?
militaryguy95 12
they're waiting for next year
diving_fml 30
could have been nickels and dimes.
diving_fml 30
umm yes, money is what I meant.....
onlychildFTW 34
What did you mean then?
ohSNAPyall 27
Weed, apparently.
keiNan_fml 35
did she give them note saying don't forget to use twice a day
thenamesjan 13
Your house must be very popular in your block