Today, I was having an intimate moment with my detachable shower head. I opened my eyes to find my husband of 4 months looking down on me. The only thing he said was, "You too?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked in on my husband having sex with the shower wall. When I got in the shower with him he immediately went soft. FML
Today, while making love to my boyfriend, I noticed that instead of looking at me, he was admiring himself in the mirror. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. In the heat of the moment, I said his name. He immediately stopped, gave me a deadly serious look and said "Huh? What?" FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I had sex with a coworker I've had my eye on for awhile. Immediately after, he turned on the light and got on his phone. Me, trying to start a conversation, I said, "Well, that was fun." He looked at me and said, "Was it?" FML
Today, I was surprised that my husband suggested we take a shower together to save water. He also suggested we should wear our bathing suits so we don't have to see each others "privates." FML
Today, while at a restaurant with my husband for our 4-year anniversary, he kept behaving strangely, breathing deeply and eventually sighing happily. I thought the wine had just gone to his head. Nope; he proudly admitted later that he'd jerked off without anyone noticing, even me. FML
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Top comments
skullet 0
that shower head is SUCH A ****!
iamelrebel 0
big deal, you guys should just have got it on right there...
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Comments (67)
Bran_Dizzle_ 0
wait...so does he shove the showerhead up his ass?? o-O
extra_unordinary 0
AAHHH!!!!! BUTT-SEX!!!
miz66independent 1
Cowboy buttsex!
Jennax531 0
YDI for not locking the door!
DevilDoodle 0
Hahaha what a funny thing to say in that situation!! I would've laughed my ass off if I were you.
Lightz_Camera_Me 0
Lmao if only the showerhead could talk the storys it'd have...lol
bikeduster 0
Well a female playing with herself in the shower is reallly "nice" but a man...thats a little disturbing. No offence ma'am
McLovinIt 0
how is this an FML? Find something else to bitch about...
Gitsandshiggles 0
are you sure he didn't say "you two?" or even better.. "YouTube" and then bust out the camera!
SouthParkAddict 0
nice.
ZombieMassacre 0
Hahahaha, nice.
HXCxSceneKidx 0
Wait ur husband shoves it up his ass?! Lmfaooooooooooooooooooooo Does it suck to have a husband that likes it up the pooper??