Today, I had just finished writing an essay for English. I was proud of it and thought it was one of my best works. I decided to show it to my mom, who is an English major. She read it, turned to me and said, "You know, if you actually want to go to UCLA, you're going to need to actually try." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom called and told me I got accepted to my first-choice college. I got really excited and asked her to read me the letter. As she started to read it, she said, "Oops... uh, nevermind." FML
Today, I submitted my 5000 word assignment. When I got home, my mother asked if I'd checked it through one more time like she always warned me to do. I hadn't, therefore hadn't noticed the paragraph on page 11 that she'd written, telling me to pay attention to the small details. FML
Today, I wrote a poem and was very proud of it. I showed it to my mom. After reading it, her response was, "What is this shit?" FML
Today, I had to write an essay for school explaining what motivates me to study. The more I tried to write it, the more I realized I've been wasting my time going back to school, and I never really wanted it. FML
Today, I am expected to write an 8 page essay, due tonight. The reason why I don't even have one page yet? My mom decided to take away the only computer I have the essay saved on because I have an 'F' in English. The essay is for English. FML
Today, I received a terrible grade for an essay I worked really hard on. I had two friends, one being an English major, check it over. However, apparently I "clearly didn't use spellcheck" on this essay just like the last one I submitted to her. FML
Today, I received my acceptance letter to one of the most prestigious universities in the US, as well as a nice scholarship. I was so proud of myself, I eagerly showed my dad, hoping he would shed a tear or two. His only words were, "Just get a job so you can get the hell out of my house." FML
Today, I got feedback on an essay I wrote, by my mum who is also a teacher. She said it was 'worse than most of her pupils'. She teaches 10-year-olds. I'm a 20-year-old student at university. FML
Today, I excitedly told my mom how I got accepted to the master’s program of my dreams. She decided now would be a good time to proudly repeat for the millionth time how she gave up a full ride to the Ivy League to marry my father, and I ought to be a "good woman" and do the same. FML
Today, I got an F because I’m an idiot and wrote my essay on WW1 instead of WW2. I offered to resubmit a correct essay, but my mom stormed to school to demand it be changed to at least a B, because it was a good essay, even if it was on the wrong war. God, she’s impossible and embarrassing. FML
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Top comments
TJStarzZ 8
Dude, my mother is a Science major, my anatomy teacher, and all that jazz. Doesn't mean that EVERYTHING she says is right, though. You should take the paper to your professor, cause knowing my mom, when I took my perfectly dissected fetal pig and removed brain to her, she got mad because it was better than the one she did a few years back. All I'm saying is, don't just take her words to heart, if you did great and you know it, you got nothing to worry about.
evangldbrg 0
iPhone iPhail!
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Comments (74)
stereoskyline_fml 0
iPhone first!
evangldbrg 0
iPhone iPhail!
TJStarzZ 8
Dude, my mother is a Science major, my anatomy teacher, and all that jazz. Doesn't mean that EVERYTHING she says is right, though. You should take the paper to your professor, cause knowing my mom, when I took my perfectly dissected fetal pig and removed brain to her, she got mad because it was better than the one she did a few years back. All I'm saying is, don't just take her words to heart, if you did great and you know it, you got nothing to worry about.
sugarysofalof 22
TLDR
QuentinM95 0
Man I'm sorry. Moms just suck. No one but a mom could possibly say anything that tactless.
Chopperman_fml 0
Since when are moms supposed to be tactful? OP's mom brought attention to the problem before it reached the outside world so he could fix it. A real FML would be the OP's mom praising the paper, followed by the OP getting a failing grade on it.
SusanaSaysRawrxD 0
Well, if you actually want to go to UCLA, you should actually work really hard on that paper, so you can get an actual good grade on it. Maybe then the UCLA people will think you're actually smart! /endmock. Seriously, OP? Either your teacher speaks like a 2nd grader, or you really do need to work on your writing skills. So, I'm actually gonna go with YDI. The FML people are probably gonna fix this, so this comment won't make much sense soon. Whatever.
katinthehat 0
so, the OP deserves to be insulted because his MOM said "actually" twice in a sentence? of course. that's perfectly logical.
BeeSkwaird 0
Even if the mom weren't going for the poesy of parallel construction, take out either "actually" and you change the meaning of the sentence. She did not mispeak. She tried to be candid with you, OP. Ask for some specific pointers and try to improve your writing if you want to get into a good college. I didn't always want to listen to my mom, but she was usually right, and later I won a lot of money for my writing skills. Now she calls me for writing help.
krnmafia92 0
The OP is most likely paraphrasing what his mother said. We already know that the OP has writing skills. Once one hears something IRL, one tends to make it one's own. People don't memorize word for word quotes from everyday life, but remember mostly the gist of things. Or... the mother might just be using the either "either" actually for extra emphasis since the OP seems thick-headed.
dacho 7
YDI for having a mom.
blland 0
yeah, that works.
Flutist 3
You don't always need to get compliments from your parents. Also, some people don't try on their papers, they think just because they string a compentent sentence together they are English majors. You might just really suck at writing.
FlaminYawn 0
LOL, UCLA is a state school. Who has to try to get in? Retards can get degrees from state schools.
blameyourself 0
UCLA is one of the most selective public universities in the U.S. People who do their best all throughout high school don't make it in. Did you go to a state school?
dudeitsdanny 10
No, he went to a city college and flunked out. ;D
SusanaSaysRawrxD 0
Blah, I read it wrong. It's the OP's mom, not his teacher.
Mortanious 0
YDI for having low standards, listen to your mother and go improve your skills.
lolwatlol 0
Your mom is just mad because she got a useless major.