Today, I had sex with a coworker I've had my eye on for awhile. Immediately after, he turned on the light and got on his phone. Me, trying to start a conversation, I said, "Well, that was fun." He looked at me and said, "Was it?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, when I walked into work all of my co-workers were giggling and asking "How was YOUR night last night?". Last night I had sex for the first time with someone I'm seeing secretly (with good reason). That person is my boss. He told everyone. FML
Today, I finally had sex with a coworker I’d been flirting with for nearly 2 and half years. The sex lasted less than 2 and a half minutes. FML
Today, I told my coworker who I have been crushing on for a while, that I really enjoyed our time last night. I immediately realized that the time we spent last night was in my sex dream. FML
Today, I was having a good talk with a coworker and I was excited that I've made my first friend at work. After sharing some stories and some laughs he asked if I had a boyfriend. I said I do. He asked if I was always faithful, I said I was. He then walked away. FML
Today, my creepy co-worker walked up and said, "You know, I was having sex with this girl last night, and I almost said your name." FML
Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML
Today, I had sex. The guy texted me an hour later, saying, "That was awkward. Let's not do that again." FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been flirting with for months. Immediately after, he gave me the "let's just be friends" speech then left for work, accidentally locking me in his apartment. I had to call his ex-girlfriend to come let me out. She smirked. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, I was working by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated, I started to moan and say dirty things… Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML
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Top comments
Generalleroy 12
who haves sex with a coworker. thats what not to do at work 101
Colon_Man 17
Uh-oh! His short term memory is fading. Best get him to a hospital!
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Comments (20)
Generalleroy 12
who haves sex with a coworker. thats what not to do at work 101
Konarika 11
Wow, you just set a record in "How many grammar and punctuation rules can you break in one post?"
Generalleroy 12
I just don't care 101
jk_waks23 19
We have a grammar nazi in the house,ladies and gentlemen! Lol
Cali 57
There was clearly immediate regret!
notsosupernanny 8
me. and now I'm happily married to the guy with a kid. it doesn't always end badly
maharb01 17
Monday will definitely be fun
Colon_Man 17
Uh-oh! His short term memory is fading. Best get him to a hospital!
zedjaleaf1 11
By far should be top comment ?
crudeandrudeguy 29
It is?
Cynical_1 26
That's when you respond with, "Well no, you were terrible actually. I just didn't want to hurt your feelings."
iZoidberg 11
Yes, hurting people’s feelings because you’re bad in bed is mature.
bobslawnservice 16
You probably need to hone your skills in the sack.
species4872 20
Maybe you should have had the conversation first.
almost_there44 26
If you couldn't even start a conversation with him, maybe you shouldn't have had sex with him, especially because he is a coworker.
jcash52426 5
At least you didn't shout out Im giving you a raise ! Like George Costanza.
Max Gray 2
1) Don't have sex with coworkers, for any reason, ever. 2) Stop being so narcissistic that you think just because you like them, that they will automatically like you back. 3) Stop having sex with people that you are not in a relationship with, or at least who you have been on a couple nice dates with at the very least. I mean, really? You had a one night stand with a coworker (who is obviously far more attractive than you), and you really expected it to turn into something? You are clearly one of those "everyone gets a trophy" generation, you probably feel entitled to him just because you want him. Sorry- that's not how life works. He wants to get the hottest girl he can get, just like you wanna get the hottest guy you can get. So when you go for people out of your league, it's an unfair exchange, and therefore you will get used. Because your value is simply not enough to keep him around.
fleuretta 19
I'm pretty sure they're two guys. No sexy girl in this story.
superpandamonium 7
1.) are you It's father or priest? 2.) It's not narcissistic to start a conversation. 3.) **** off for being a twatwaffle.
superpandamonium 7
1.) are you OP's father or priest? 2.) It's not narcissistic to start a conversation. 3.) **** off for being a twatwaffle.
superpandamonium 7
1.) are you OP's father or priest? 2.) It's not narcissistic to start a conversation. 3.) **** off for being a twatwaffle.
superpandamonium 7
1.) are you OP's father or priest? 2.) It's not narcissistic to start a conversation. 3.) **** off for being a twatwaffle.
Dustmop 18
How do you even know how attractive OP is and the person they slept with?
BrotherTheo 31
There is an ancient Phrase- 'Don't shit where you eat.' This basically means, do not do pleasure where you do...Business. There are many reasons, first and foremost being that when stuff gets complicated (and it pretty much *always* gets complicated...) It will quite probably make your work life...Messy. Nobody needs that.