Today, I approached a cute girl at a club, and she started barking at me like a rabid dog. Thinking she might be mentally unhinged, I left, only to see the same girl laughing her ass off with her friends minutes later. When I went back over, her friends started barking at me too. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML
Today, I was flirting with a cute girl at a club. She seemed into me and said I was hot. I said thanks and grinned. I guess my grin looked psychopathic, because her expression turned to horror, and she quickly excused herself. She was the only girl who's ever shown any interest in me. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML
Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML
Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML
Today, I went to a club with my girlfriend and her buddies. An hour in, I saw her making out with a guy on the dance floor, so I confronted her. She stormed off to the bar and said something to her friend, who then came over and angrily slapped me across the face. Yeah, I'm confused too. FML
Today, I was at a nightclub when some dick squeezed the ass of the girl beside me. She whirled around and started yelling and slapping me across the face. I was dragged out by the bouncers, to cheers from the people around us. FML
Today, I met a really cute girl at a club. At first, she told me I was cute. Then, she slurred that I look like "a spork on legs." Then she sprayed the inside of my mouth with vomit as she kissed me. FML
Today, at a nightclub, a cute girl started hitting on me. I got into it and we danced. Just as she started getting frisky with me, a guy shoved me off, smacked me to the floor with a right-hook, and shouted, "That's what you get for touching my woman." FML
Today, I was at a club with my girlfriend of a year. A guy starts hitting on her while I'm sitting right next to her. He then asks her to go back to his place for some fun, so I start laughing thinking that there is no chance she would even consider this. I walked home alone. FML
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Top comments
dogpup4 23
What a bitch. Badum-tsh.
snowman34542 0
Jenna marbles
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Comments (103)
Hon3y_schnucums 1
Well bitches bark when their in heat
THE_A_TEEN 28
If they all barked at you, then there must be a dominant male in their mist. My advice: Find the dominant male, get rid of him and establish yourself as the leader of their pack. Those bitches will be all over you. Brought to you by Caesar Milan
myusernamehur 0
She didnt do the face.. She skipped a step.. it worked though.
gracehi 33
You guys are being so hard on these girls. They were just having fun (albeit at OP's expense) and night clubs are for fun. I mean, clubs aren't exactly classy places. OP, don't take it personally. Sometimes we girls just wanna dance! We're not always interested in talking to guys.
downtime 13
54, And guys who lie, manipulate and cheat on girls are just having fun at the girls expense too, so I guess thats okay by your logic! Sometimes we guys just wanna **** things. Because some idiot having fun negates any negative impact on anyone around them...
katiemarek2 10
Thats a jenna marbles trick. Dude, shes not into you
aleeshttylXD 9
cant wait till jenna marbles hears about this.. > :]
anneis143 3
omg!! JENNA MARBLES METHOD! she barked at u so that ud leave cuz she didnt want anything to do with you. its from the follow up video from The Face
sammi_olsen 1
Haha, Jenna Marbles. (:
CustardAndPie 13
I am genuinely impressed by how many people on FML have never watched Jenna Marbles' videos. This girl was clearly employing one of her techniques. Am I laughing my head off here.
anarchist884 9
Am I the only one who hasn't heard of Jenna Marbles?!
CustardAndPie 13
#69, very possibly.
brandennn 10
bitches be crazy