Today, I was laying in bed with the covers over me, when I got an itch on my leg. It felt really good to scratch it so I got really into it. At that very moment my mom walked in, saw me doing a back and forth motion under the covers, gave me a look of disgust, and walked out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got some really bad mosquito bites on the outside of my thighs. They itched, and my jeans prevented me from scratching them, so I unbuttoned my pants, stuck my down my leg and started scratching. My mom walked in, and won't believe I wasn't masturbating. FML
Today, the rash on my thigh started itching again. I felt good after a vigorous scratch, but the relief did not extend to my roommate, who only saw me at my laptop with my hand moving up and down in my pants. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh, I had an itch…" FML
Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML
Today, I decided to lay out and tan. I fell asleep and got sun burned and bitten numerous times by mosquitoes. If I scratch my itch, the burn hurts terribly. If I don't scratch it, it itches terribly. FML
Today, I was masturbating on my inflatable air mattress that squeaks when you move. Suddenly, my mom burst into my room to ask if I was okay because she thought the squeaking was me crying. I ripped my hands from my pants and turned on my side; she walked over and grabbed my hands to console me. FML
Today, I was walking to the bus in my favorite jeans, and I felt a uncontrollable itch in my leg. I scratched and it went away, but then I felt something moving on my leg. I hadn't worn my jeans in so long that a spider had decided to make it a nest. FML
Today, I was laying in bed facing my dad. In the middle of our conversation, I noticed he became interested in something behind me. I turn around to the sight of my mom lifting up her shirt, flashing her boobs. FML
Today, I was dry-walling a house when my butt started to itch. I bent over to scratch it on a piece of plywood, at which point the client's wife walked in and asked what the fuck I was doing. FML
Today, after receiving a lovely massage from my boyfriend, I was lying topless in bed beside him. Just as I was thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for some intimacy, he looks at me and says, "My mom is SO awesome." FML
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Top comments
BroSkii69 8
OH YEAAAH BABY SCRATCH THAT LEG REEEAAAL GOOD ******* face*
NeedAHaircut 0
When will kids these days learn. when your parents walk in on you masturbating always follow 2 simple steps: 1. Look them right in the eyes 2. Finish masturbating. they will never walk in your room without knocking again
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Comments (71)
xStarrFeeshLovsY 0
aww...srry just explain...Explaining always mkes it betta!!!!! ;D lmfao
AssDan 0
Whip it out and chase her out of the room with it.
jitterbug25 0
hahahhahahah SUPER WIN^^^^:D
SCBeauty1983 0
They call them 'door locks' for a reason...
kennaem1 11
Some people don't HAVE locks on their doors. I don't.
robj118 10
What the ****, this is EXACTLY like the FML where the person was petting their cat under the covers and someone walked in on them and thought they were playing with themselves. How about you post an FML that isnt a twist of another persons, dumb ******* OP
FYLDeep 26
lying in bed*
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
OP, get some Campho-Phenique. It's amazing on itchy skin. Just make sure you only use it for scratching, and not "scratching."
DeathHead 0
mom should have joined.
Zebidee 9
You got this the wrong way round. This is the version you were meant to send your mother. Right now she's reading a post that says "Today, my Mom walked in on me frantically rubbing one out, but I totally lied and said I was scratching an itch. I'm not sure if she bought it or not. FML."
chooch556 0
yell Im not finished yet mom! and make the *fap fap fap * sound under the sheet and also yell take a picture it will last longer!. in all seriousness, what is the mom doing out of the kitchen.
melibear89 7
lesson learned don't scratch with covers over you