Today, I was forced to work with someone I absolutely hate. I then found myself starting to like him, until he shot me in the forehead with a stapler gun. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was working at Staples and organizing some notebooks. All of a sudden, I jumped up because of a sharp pain in my back. A little girl had grabbed a stapler and stapled my back. FML
Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML
Today, my spineless shitwhip of a boss made me go fire a notoriously abusive employee. I had to act like firing him was my decision, even though I'm the secretary. Now I get to live in constant fear that the guy was serious when he threatened to find out where I live and kill me. FML
Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML
Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML
Today, being so desperate for money, I accepted a job in which I get shot at with paintballs for six hours. FML
Today, I taught my friend how to use a staple gun. She taught me how to get staples out of my hand. FML
Today, my lazy bastard of a co-worker punched me straight in the jaw because he didn't get the promotion I did. Being his new manager, I fired him. A few hours later, I was fired for "abusing" my power. FML
Today, my boss was being a total asshole. While in the bathroom, he turned his back on me, so I gave him the finger, mouthed obscenities, and pantomimed stabbing him with a knife. He was looking in the mirror and saw everything. FML
Today, my boss forced me to come into work despite having a bad cold. While waiting a table, I violently sneezed and sprayed a child's face with snot. His dad got so pissed that my boss had to pretend to fire me just to calm him down. FML
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Top comments
nanner42 13
Should have shot him back
coolboy675 16
Boom, headshot!
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Comments (42)
msbitz 10
guess you hate them again..
PenguinBitch 44
You hated him before for a reason right? You should have seen it coming.
coolboy675 16
She did see it coming; she just couldn't move away fast enough.
PenguinBitch 44
But she started to like him. It seems she was moving towards him and the fact that this might happened was blurred.
Fluffydemise 18
Maybe OPs colleague is a nice guy who had the misfortune to be working with someone who actively hates him. Maybe OPs colleague thought that assault by staple gun was the only remit to not be shackled to a woman who hates him! Maybe.
Kuhu1993 21
I dont think he deliberately did that. You can continue to like him =D
Danielle7994 18
...How do you accidentally shoot someone in the head with a stapler gun???
cosmosis 12
I accidently beat a bully with a golfclub once... Multiple times. Sometimes these things happen.
Fluffydemise 18
I accidentally picked up a tree branch and accidentally swung it into my bully's face when I was about 9 years old. He got a curved scar which bore more than a little resemblance to the letter jay, which is coincidentally also my first name. Paybacks a bitch >:D
GrinchFu1 27
Maybe this guy was, and has been, acting like a douche bag because he's socially awkward and kinda has a crush on you or something. You know that little boy who stole your jacket in grade school just to have an excuse to talk to you? ... This guy may be the grown version of that awkward kid on the playground. I'm sure he feels like a complete moron and likely didn't do it on purpose. Or maybe he's just a ****** prick! Hope your head feels better!
Smoxxii 17
They shouldn't have those things in school these days... Just sayin'
Smoxxii 17
I say "school" because I'm stupid...
Zen_Mei 17
#40 Agreed!!
ksks1234 33
Everyone knows when a guy punches you (or, in this case, staples you) it is because he likes you. Update your kootie shot and punch (or staple) him back.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Looks like the beginning of a cheap rom-com. And to all those who says, it's probably because he likes you; I don't agree. Chances are that he does not at all. Girls should stop thinking that because a guy is mean to you, hje secretlly fancies you. That could on the long run encourage accepting abusive behaviours.
D3ATHZ3RO 15
You can sue!
Bibliovore 26
Or, y'know, just take it to HR. Or, if anything like it happens again, call the police on him for having physically attacked you. What if his aim or the stapler's were off and a staple went into OP's eye, or otherwise seriously damaged her?
cosmosis 12
How did you know her name is Sue? But to be serious for a second. That would have to be the stupidest idea to date. "And then your Honour, he shot staples at me:(:(:( " yep, youre a whiney *******!!! This whole sueing thing has gotten out of control. What is society coming to??
Jharrist89 12
You need to "One Up" him.