Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, I was relaxing in bed with an arm kind of behind my head, when I noticed a huge spider resting on my armpit. My sister said my screaming sounded like a "witch being burned to death" for all of 5 seconds before I realized the "spider" was just my armpit hair. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML
Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML
Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom at a party when I noticed a spider the size of a golf ball on the toilet paper roll. I screamed, tripped over my own feet trying to flee, and fell right into the bathtub. Everyone at the party heard. FML
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
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Top comments
deadangel_fml 0
First post I've read today that genuinely made me LOL. I can so totally picture myself doing that. Spiders freak me out.
TheVerne 0
I do things like that all the time. At night, I often feel something touch my foot and kick really hard...only to realize it's my other foot.
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Comments (102)
spreadthelove 0
hahaha that sounds like something that would happen to me, except that i would probably first run around screaming for a few minutes and only then i would throw myself against a wall! no, i'm not afraid of spiders, not at all. hehe
Tomo_Potter 0
HAHAHA Awesome. I've done that myself, it's my alarm for 'HAIRCUT TIME'!
ihateyouall 0
i think you have aids you dirty little motherlicking bag of piss
redbluegreen 41
This reminds me of The Grudge shower scene. Hahaha. I've done that though. Maybe it's time for a haircut?
agneshatesyou 10
bahahahaha Best part about this was you throwing yourself VIOLENTLY against a wall! I love it :D I told my best friend this and she died for probably five minutes and it still makes her laugh.
hayhen 0
You just made my extremely FML day, a little bit better.... but just a little.
AnneFTW 17
LMAO. Awesome. :D
XThatOnePersonX 8
That could have been me. That so could have been me.
naysay91 0
Something similar to me happened last week. I was leaning against my bed reading a book and I had my head down and was standing directly under my ceiling fan. The fan blew a few strands of stray hair on my face and it felt like a bunch of little legs. I dropped my book and went wild. lol Needless to say that whole side of my face is still covered in scratches.
koby109 0
That was smart of you.