Today, while alone in the childcare centre I work at, one of the children farted bad enough to trigger my morning sickness. Because I was alone, I couldn't leave the room, which resulted in me throwing up into a 2-year-old-sized toilet, while 12 toddlers either watched or ran wild. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom, yelling, "Mommy! Mommy! That lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML
Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I'm pregnant, though I don't really suffer from morning sickness. I do however suffer from sympathy puking, which kicked in with horrifying consequences when someone burst in and started vomiting in one of the other stalls. FML
Today, after feeling sick all day at work, my shift was about to end. Twenty minutes before I was able to clock out, some kid puked all over herself in the playground. FML
Today, my morning sickness was so bad that I threw up everywhere, just from thinking about the pretend meal that a kid had made for me. FML
Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML
Today, at the small daycare I run, I turned around to put something away. I heard a splashing sound and then saw one of my kids vomiting. He puked several times, and managed to hit the only rug in the entire house. FML
Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML
Today, I have horrible morning sickness. I was helping my daughter fingerpaint, when suddenly the smell of the paint set my stomach off. I threw up all over myself and her painting. FML
Today, I work at a doggy day care. Employees are not allowed to leave the dogs unsupervised for any reason. So while I was alone in a yard, my stomach decided that it would be the perfect time to empty itself. Because I didn’t want to lose my job, I puked in front of everyone. FML
Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML
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Top comments
kingh786 10
At least your teaching them to barf in toilets
CyberSeeker 20
did it all fit
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Comments (50)
Doubtful_Judge 23
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Can you not take maternity leave?
DocBastard 40
Maternity leave...BEFORE her child is born? Unless I'm missing something, you don't seem to understand the concept of maternity leave.
kaylizs 20
Morning sickness most commonly occurs in the first trimester. You don't take maternity leave as soon as you're pregnant. "Hey, boss, I know I'm scheduled to work a 12 hour shift tomorrow, but my boyfriend just went in without a condom so now I might have a fused egg/sperm combo. Will update with details in 2 weeks or so. Until then, I'm on maternity leave." :p
Flamepelt 15
I believe a fused egg/sperm combo is called a zygote
Brandi_Faith 34
Because morning sickness is most usually during the first trimester, she can't take maternity leave. Maternity leave is so the mother (or father) can spend their first year (roughly) with their new baby. Some moms take the last few weeks or month off because they're extremely uncomfortable and sometimes the doctor can order bed rest which can start the maternity leave early (although I think if it's doctor ordered than it's usually a sick thing and doesn't necessarily go towards your maternity leave time). But most moms work as long as possible because they don't want to take their month or two off work and away from time spent with their baby.
cazza3 15
It is possible. Most people take maternity leave from about 36 weeks pregnant. I stopped work at 8 weeks pregnant and had morning sickness untill I delivered at 37 weeks, a normal time for mat leave.
sturschaedel 27
Reading all the comments here I get the impression I live in Wonderland. Where I live you get to leave work 8 weeks before your anticipated delivery date until up to two years after birth and are still guaranteed your job back.
thefmlman2011 37
Tough Luck, OP, congrats on the pregnancy though!
91hayek 31
Those kids were bound to set you off one way or another. Toddlers are just triggers for that sort of thing.
amzee96 18
Why on earth were you alone with 12 children in a toddlers room! I work in childcare too, and that definately doesn't meet the regulations.
megglesmcfly 0
Regulations vary from state to state if OP is in the USA. I read of some states having ridiculous ratios, like 1:13 for toddlers and 1:8 for infants.
amc597 28
#23 the ratio for toddlers at the daycare I work at is 1:6, I highly doubt one teacher would be allowed to stay alone with 13 toddlers.
smileforme911 10
My other carer was on break and got caught up talking o the boss
pizzolar 6
What the hell state do you live in? In most, its illegal for a carer to go.on break without some sort of backup available.
leahm88 5
There should have been at least 2 other people in the room with you with 12 toddlers! I agree your life sucks! Coz your centre is running way out of ratio!!
harrypotter322 18
At the center I work at, the ratio for toddlers is 1:6, so maybe the other coworker was in the bathroom?
Kallian_fml 21
Ratio at my centre is 1:8 for toddlers. Different places, different rules.
coolbeans26 12
Either way if their ratio is 1:8 there should have been someone else there and no matter where u r it's illegal to leave someone out of ratio this would have easily been controlled if they followed those rules
tsr1993 16
poor op. that's horrible. at least in childcare toilets are close by
Kallian_fml 21
Don't worry OP, it could've been worse. One day at my centre, the only staff toilet was clogged and overflowing, and one of the staff had severe diarrhoea. We couldn't get a plumber in for another 3 hours, and she ended up using one of the child sized toilets. She then quit her job, and we haven't seen her since.
worldclassrager 41
Better than on the floor or on a kid right?
sturschaedel 27
When I was pregnant with my second child and my first was still in diapers, I used a scarf doused with a perfume that I could tolerate to cover my nose when I had to change him. Reliably kept me from puking.
sbarua219 17
I'm sorry OP; F your life, but I can't stop laughing at this hahahaha