Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he said that I should go to the bathroom so we don't end up pregnant. When I asked why, he said that I need to "pee out the semen." I explained to him 5 times that I don't pee out of my vagina. He still doesn't get it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I yet again had to explain to my boyfriend that, yes, I can get pregnant even if I don't actually have an orgasm. FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that the reason I don't want to stay overnight at his house is because I still occasionally wet the bed. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I like, but I had to pee really bad. It got really wet down there, and he thought I squirted. I peed everywhere. I let him believe he made me squirt. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. Right after, he left the room and went to the bathroom to throw up. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend told me that he was going to pee on me to "mark his territory." When I told him that it was disgusting, he said, "last time, I just peed on you in the shower." FML
Today, I went to give my boyfriend head, and his dick tasted like condoms. I'm 5 months pregnant, we obviously don't use condoms. He got scared when I stopped and told him, then he got mad at me. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML
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Top comments
NotYourOrdinary7 6
If he doesn't want you to become pregnant, some sort of contraception should have been used.
Moep20 24
I am sorry that you have such a dumb boyfriend D: Try explaining it to him with pictures maybe? Let him see for himself that there are two openings?
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Comments (319)
aaronlopez20 4
ha i didnt know that until my gf told me
isamisis 9
A dude that dumb shouldn't lower your bar of expectations. Cut him loose. You deserve better.
HRBINGER0fdeath 3
If you don't want to become pregnant, use protection.
onorexveritas 24
people who don't understand the dynamics of the human reproductive system shouldn't have sex.
The_F3rris 11
My bf didnt know there were two different holes down there either. I swear they taught this in sex ed though.
Scattertom 12
That's funny, I was the one to tell my girlfriend that there were two sepperate holes.
itsBEEarOHseekay 12
My dad thought for the first few years of marriage that when women got their periods, they just peed blood for a few days. Wouldn't that be the life. He's not generally a moron, just uninformed when if comes to the opposite sex. There's a difference.
ocean7340 4
Time for show and tell
jrayallday895 1
Maybe you two shouldn't be having sex if you're not wearing protection and he doesn't know what a ****** is. Hmmmm? Just sayin.
rofflewaffle 9
You should still pee after so you don't get a UTI.