Today, I saw a man on the bus with the strangest band shirt I have ever seen. I couldn't help but stare at it and try and figure out what the band was… until he turned to me and said, "Why not take a picture, asshole?" then got off the bus. As he walked away, I saw that he was missing an arm. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a really cute guy sat across from me on the bus. He smiled at me, then tensed his muscles and lifted a heavy bag with one arm. Thinking he was trying to act "macho" to impress me, I rolled my eyes and threw him an annoyed/disgusted look. When he got off, I realized he only had one arm. FML
Today, I saw a cute guy on the bus. I smiled at him and he smiled back. After a couple of stops, he got off the bus. He bumped into me, turned around, apologized, and winked. I stood there feeling good about myself. Then I realized he stole my wallet. FML
Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML
Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML
Today, I was taking the bus home from work. As I was getting off an old man whistled at me, I told him to go to hell and got off the bus. When the bus drove away the old man stood in the back of the bus, holding up the wallet I left that he was trying to give to me. FML
Today, as I was taking the bus home, I sat down next to a man wearing an FML shirt. While snickering I said to him "You totally deserved it." I guess he thought that comment deserved a broken nose. FML
Today, I went to the beach. While I was enjoying the sun, an old man with prosthetic leg and no clothes on sat next to me. He took off his fake leg and put it behind his head. Then he opened his legs revealing his "stuff." I will never unsee this. Ever. FML
Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML
Today, while on the bus, I watched a homeless man pop a pimple on his arm and eat it. FML
Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML
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Top comments
Pyrolo 5
5th!!! Don't worry. Once I was on the beach with my brother and a friend and his family. This very hot chick with a labrador at her side was jogging topless in a bikini bottom. After she had passes, my friend's mother asked all the men if we had noticed anything wierd about her. None of us had. As it turns out, she was missing an arm. Guessing I was looking a her chest.
bebz_fml 0
ah don't worry bout it, you didn't know.
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Comments (76)
jkjackson1990 0
How hard is it to ask someone what band is on their shirt. or say sorry i was just trying to figure out what the band was. definitely not f your life, because you had the power means and common sense to open your damn mouth and ask.
dunnojonathan 0
Ouch...I know people with prosthetic limbs are self-conscious about them, but don't always assume someone is staring at it..
blastvortex 4
If he had any sense, he could've noticed that you were looking at his shirt, not his lack of appendage. It's not your fault that he's a stupid asshole. Still, staring can be inconsiderate even at the best of times....
Panther_fml 0
Repeat. Nice job stealing the idea from somebody's FML. Today, on the train to work, the train guard was hot and I became stupidly nervous. I'm very shy and was trying to avoid eye-contact. He said 'THANK YOU', in a pissed off tone of voice and glared at me. I had absent-mindedly been staring in the direction of his prosthetic arm the entire time. FML
ColdGold 6
If you took a picture you could have looked at it longer. Duh!
RacheeRoo 0
this is very very similar to another FML...
YOUbeTROLLIN 0
how do u not realize someone missing an arm?
hockeyhood66 0
omg i hate those situations! hahah that totally sucks!
stumpygremlin 13
Must've been some kind of black metal shirt
bradleynash 0
I can almost guarantee you the band was Job for a Cowboy. the lettering they use (if you can even call it that) is so crazy it is pretty much impossible to see what it is. Of course after you realize it says "Job for a Cowboy" you can see it, but holy crap!