Today, I went to the beach. While I was enjoying the sun, an old man with prosthetic leg and no clothes on sat next to me. He took off his fake leg and put it behind his head. Then he opened his legs revealing his "stuff." I will never unsee this. Ever. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML
Today, while shopping, an old man came up to me and told me I should be ashamed for walking around fake limping, and that it's horrible to mock people who actually limp from serious injuries. I wasn't faking, I was born without my right leg and I was getting used to my new prosthetic one. FML
Today, I was at the beach with my buddy. Messing around, he swam up behind me and dunked me under the water. Naturally, moments later I swam behind him, grabbed both his ankles and stood up, flipping him completely, only to see him watching me from a few feet away. I flipped a 70 year old man. FML
Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML
Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML
Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off, so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML
Today, I had dinner with my grandparents. At the table, my grandfather openly complained about how hard it is for him to get out of their hot tub. Not because of his prosthetic leg, but because his balls somehow "get stuck". I really didn't need to know that. FML
Today, I got up from bed after a good night's sleep, and walked outside. The first thing I saw was my 60-ish year-old neighbor bent over, picking up a newspaper. He was wearing nothing but a way too short bathrobe and a pair of rubber boots. FML
Today, I saw a man lying face down in a field and thinking he was injured, I ran over to help. As soon as I got to him, I realized he was completely naked. He stood up and chased after me. FML
Today, I took my son to a doctor’s appointment. As we were walking to the office, we saw a homeless man, stark naked, bathing in the decorative fountain. I hurried us inside but unfortunately my son got full view of well everything. FML
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Top comments
Lifes_a_bust 0
A pillow for a leg, that's handy.
immaMonsta 8
Well why were you staring for so long? It's rude to stare.
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Comments (142)
immaMonsta 8
Well why were you staring for so long? It's rude to stare.
xleanne_aLly 23
I-I-I work out! I'm sexy and I know it. *Puts on sunglasses*
instnt1nfction 17
*takes off your glasses and breaks them* You are inside your house, you don't need glasses. Unless the glasses are for enhancing your vision.
xleanne_aLly 23
Why yes. I'm pretty blind without them... you ass. Those were expensive.
p3mguin 7
It's okay you can buy a penguin off me for a low price ooooofooooooffff. 19.99 plus shipping and handling
geerod22 5
Its gettin' hot out here, so take off all your legs!
thiscrazything 1
You don't have to stare, it only takes a second for that kind of image to burn your retina's forever.
geerod22 5
I was caught between my previous comment and "I'm too sexy for my leg..."
akg98 13
Poor leg, on tht creepy man...
vanillacocoa 6
At least you now know what kind of "stuff" you don't like. Practice for the future :))
onlychildFTW 34
Very true! That's the best way to see what you like and don't like!
TheDrudgeChild 4
I'd just like to know why OP had to say "stuff". I mean really, is genitals too taboo of a word?
Lifes_a_bust 0
A pillow for a leg, that's handy.
lopsop 12
I might have to get me one of those
yaya1213 6
You mean a leg as a pillow* if it was a pillow as a leg he wouldn't be able to walk properly he would just fumble and fall
b00kn3rd 14
Well if it was a pillow for a leg he'd have an assured spot in the LOPWSACBP*. ......They're working on the acronym. *League Of Pirates With Soft And Cuddly Body Parts
CptZoe 10
I'd say it was more leggy than handy! Badum tshhh!! Thank you, thank you. I'm here till Thursday.
apache316 6
Hmm I guess you gotta tan those hard to reach places
nofearjenshere 12
He's got to stay fresh for the ladies. (;
therealslim 15
There's a reason those we refer to those places as 'where the sun don't shine'
raauul_4 5
You might wanna go to therapy.
auzz1_pride 9
Yes he would wanna go to therapy for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, sorry OP from this commenters knowledge of you it looks like not all the therapists In the world can save you now.
ChickInGreenVans 12
*Dead and buried!! from laughter.. Ahem!! best FML thus far today!!
SkoomaKi 28
That is THE way to carry stuff. Imma go cut my leg off and get this unique prosthetic leg.
summy15423 12
He probably lost it in war or something. That's just something you don't joke about. You should be happy for how fortunate you are.
SkoomaKi 28
Yeah, I didn't really put much effort into the comment. But you're right, I'm sorry.
therealslim 15
Skooms. I expected better from you.
KiddNYC1O 22
Time-out for you young lady!
hahayourafag 0
It actually is something to joke about. :D
ambowew 7
For some stupid reason I was picturing the huge black tank from White Chicks. Forget the peg leg, forget the lack of clothes. There was a beach and a seedy man so that leads to an evening of white chocolate that he doesn't want to melt.
OffToTheGayBar 9
I have the sudden urge to acquire a whistle and glow sticks. Dance floor, here I come.
sknabc123 8
Asta la vista Schwartz a nigro, is what she replied with xD
ycrem0n 21
That image will visit your mind.... always...
PROdigy81 4
Combined with our profile pic, that comment creeps me the **** out
ladyLALAA 29
Rub sand in your eyes, Homer Simpson style!
PrincessPesa 20
When all else fails, use cartoon logic. I just dropped an anvil on my arch nemesis yesterday. He's sure to be posting an FML about it soon.
ladyLALAA 29
I don't know why I got thumbed down and you didn't. Sorry guys! :(