Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML
Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had a picnic on the beach. It was so romantic and perfect. He leant forward to kiss me. Once we had kissed he said, "We haven't even started eating yet", and passed me a mint. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around, tickling each other. He grabbed my stomach roll and told me it looked like a baguette. FML
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Top comments
aliawesome 0
that doesn't seem like such a bad thing, bacon is yum
Ninjaface 0
Are you kidding? That's totally romantic if you play it right. "That's not the only part of me that tastes like bacon. Why don't you have a lick?"
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Comments (102)
Asstazztic 8
are u ****** kidding me Luckster... ur such a fucktard, are u like some kind of doctor or some shit... " ohh hey my dick taste's like bacon too why don't u come suck on that."
Luckster 0
What the **** is your problem? Do you really have to be such a douche? All I said is that as long as the smell isn't something obviously vulgar, there shouldn't be any problem with the situation. And learn the proper use of the English language.
grv_fml 4
human body produces many different odors/tastes each with different purpose but most importantly human sense of smell/taste detects those odors/tasted in other people, and it helps your subconscious to orient itself on one of the most basic levels. notice how some people you think smell bad actually smell neutral or good to other people? just one of the many mechanisms of genetic compatibility selection (which is why people lie and cover/hide their natural smells with artificial/chemical odors)
briannabrocious 2
I love bacon, I'm a 116 pounds. You are a ******* bastard. You should be ashamed. Goodbye sir.
LissaMccracken 23
Haha umm how are they the bad guy, you're the one being a sexist piece of shit. Go **** yourself.
welldone_fml 0
You lucky
Asstazztic 8
yea u r a ****** idiot, because I only use this for texting and these kinda internet sites... ohh wait I ****** use this in my everyday life, like my essays and all my school work... **** wow ur stupider than I thought
Luckster 0
I'm going to safely assume you're between the ages of 10-14 if you're acting like this over a simple comment that wasn't even the form of an attack, an act of trolling, or an act of douchebaggery. Take a chill pill, a nap, and we'll talk when you can act more civilized, thank you.
testing_fml 0
Using the phrase "an act of douchebaggery" is pretty douchey.
littlegolferboy 4
With a name like "Asstazztic" I can't help but feel like I must fulfill my civic duty (teehee, doody) to bury his comments.
IStabBabies 0
Stupider isn't a word, my brilliant friend.
Caassiieee 0
Nothing wrong with portable breakfast :)
jensenr88 0
at least your vaj doesn't smell like bacon...
Mx_Rider 6
haha luckster ur my hero that guys a 14 yr old douche dont listen to him lol <333333
Asstazztic 8
18 **** why don't u go suck a dick as well
Airch 9
Mate, thats a compliment, bacon is awesome.......
RPGod 0
MARRY ME!
TheViking_fml 0
That's not an FML, that's a MLIA.
youthink_fml 0
mmmmmmmmm bacon!