Today, I got into an accident and my car was totaled. My friends then took me out to a bar for a drink to make me feel better. It appears that the police officer I'd spoken to had kept my I.D. by mistake and I couldn't get into the bar. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML
Today, I got into an accident. As I was talking to a police officer about what happened, the tow truck driver managed to take my car and drive away, leaving me with no phone or wallet. I just spent an hour walking home in a hail storm. FML
Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML
Today, I got called out of class to talk to some cops. Turns out my car was involved in a hit and run accident, while I was in school and there was no possible way it could have been me. But since they have no one else, it's my fault. FML
Today, bouncing at a local bar. I I.D.'d a girl with a group of people. I told her that next time she used a fake I.D., she at least should get one with a picture that looked like her. She started crying and ran off. A guy told me that she had been in a car wreck, and had been badly disfigured. FML
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
Today, I accidentally rear-ended an undercover police car. FML
Today, I bust my lip when a car bumped into mine. As I headed home, I was stopped by the police who told me my back light was out. I tried to explain, but it just came out as "fghjiljh" because of my lip. I was arrested on suspicion of drinking and driving. FML
Today, I called the police to report that my car had been keyed. I remember going to a bar last night and getting drunk. A surveillance camera revealed that after my drunken self couldn't unlock the door to my car, I punched the door and hurt my fist so bad that I keyed my own car. FML
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Top comments
Grimmerie 31
at least you look young!
stephanie911_fml 0
You really didn't need that drink anyways. ( :
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Comments (66)
Bk130 0
Will the car be alright at least?
ImaginaryFoe 1
No, it won't. It was a *total* loss.
Kelita 0
uuuuuummmmm ok.............and..............
LemonStarship 5
Just be happy you weren't seriously injured in the accident.
xxfezxx 0
I'm with this person at least you can still walk right?
ImaginaryFoe 1
I agree but keep in mind that a relatively minor accident can total a car. A friend of mine drove over a kerb and scraped a lamppost (he was sober). It somehow tilted the axle on his car and his side panel was dinged all along the side. He was even able to drive the car home and had no injuries. The car was still declared a total loss by the insurance company.
smashgrab 0
Kerb? Wtf is a kerb?
ShrukiantheMad 0
Take one of your freinds ID's who looks simillar to you and then go buy beer and get piss drunk at home without the chance of hurting anyone on the drive back.
blitz426 0
haha sucks for u
Zebidee 9
Funny - I saw this FML going a completely different way at first - that the cops forgot to breath test you at the scene, and came back to do it after you started drinking. In that case, YDI for not being as interesting as I'd hoped.
sunnysurfchick 0
it was't a mistake cops are the biggest creeps out there. He probably shot off a couple while looking at it. wipe it off with lysol wipes when you get it back
dave04045 1
dont drive to the police station and ask for it back...theyll arrest your ass
curlz2330 1
I know that feeling sucks balls
ImaginaryFoe 1
You mean you forgot to ask for it back. It's yours; keep track of it.