Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time. I sat in the back, which was a bad idea. When it ended everyone in front of me turned around and stared. When I asked my friend what was going on, she said I had been screaming the Lord's Prayer the whole time. I hadn't even noticed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to an amusement park with my family and we all decided to ride the tallest rollercoaster. As soon as the ride got going, I realized I'd made a huge mistake and was too terrified to open my eyes. I spent the entire ride screaming, with my hands over my eyes, and afterwards my cousin called me a wuss. FML
Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time in years. Almost immediately, I realized that my shorts were no match for the forces of gravity. I spent the rest of the ride clinging to my seat for dear life while trying to subtly cover my exposed ass. FML
Today, I tried to tackle my fear of heights by riding a rollercoaster. Once we were near the top, it malfunctioned, causing it to stop, and we all had to get out and climb back down. My girlfriend laughed at me for how scared I was. FML
Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML
Today, I was on a roller coaster and this 13 year old sitting next to me was completely terrified. To cheer him up, I threw my hands in the air. While my hands were up, we hit a curve and I elbowed him in the face, making him cry. FML
Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML
Today, I went to an amusement park with a group of friends, one of whom was a girl I really like. When we got on the roller coaster, I was ecstatic that she wanted to sit next to me. Not even half-way through, I ended up puking all over the both of us. FML
Today, I went to a theme park with my friends. I was excited to ride the rollercoasters, but just as we were about to get on the biggest one, I realized I'd had left my glasses in the car. I can't see shit without them, but I decided to go on the ride anyway. I spent the entire time screaming in terror while my friends laughed, while I couldn't see a thing. FML
Today, I was on a roller coaster behind a boy who vomited in front of me as the cart shot down. It splattered all over my arm, and a little on my cheek. FML
Today, at my local amusement park, I decided it'd be fun to meet someone on the roller coaster by sitting alone and hoping that someone nice would sit next to me. I rode the roller coaster 7 times. I sat alone each time. FML
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Top comments
ama17 0
That's quite a new take on just screaming, "OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!"
Shock98 0
hahahah. what the heckkk. how did you not notice that?
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Comments (296)
Drowned 0
Well going on a roller coaster for the first time is a bit scary...
bballer32 0
LOL
gothic_sunshine 0
lol thats pretty hilarious nd embarrassing. did this happen to you again?
BrandNewKadillak 0
Was it the Bizarro Coaster at Six Flags New England?
brown_eyed_girl 0
it says it was in Massachussetts. but good guess.. NOT
stfuman 0
Yes, Massachusetts isn't part of New England, similar to how Kansas isn't part of the Plains.
GothamKnight 0
Haha. I was 6 when I went on my first coaster. Good times. You'll start enjoying them after a couple of goes. To all you fellow rollercoaster fans, I get to go to Kingda Ka and El Toro. Hahaha!
ibemad_fml 0
YDI for being religous. this is what happens. For the last time, PRAYING DOESNT WORK.
Pastor_Rich 0
it's a whole lot better than swearing
chocoLIFE_fml 2
yes :P
FalconWhitaker 20
Wow, I'm surprised nobody's responded to you in outrage yet, you adorable little wank-baiter, you! How long have you been practising the noble arts of misogyny and douche-baggery? I imagine it's been quite a while as you are skilled at both. Please consume faecal matter and expire :D
Kristoffer 35
ourfatherwhoartinheavenhallwoedbethynamethykingdomcomethywillbedoneonearthasitisinheavengiveus thisdayourdailybreadforgiveusofourtrespassesasweforgivethosewhotrespassagainstus... what are you looking at?
QBGirl123 8
lmao, thats greattt i can imagine her/him reciting this...thats sooo funny :D
Sokai_fml 0
I couldn't stop laughing when I read your comment.
Kristoffer 35
If you draw attention to it, then it knows that you were affected by it.