Today, I took a big sniff of a flower in my garden. I spent the rest of the morning blowing little bugs out of my nose. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking through a field with my boyfriend and he picked me some pretty flowers. I hugged him and leant in to sniff them. In doing so, I inhaled a bee up my nose and had to force it out my swollen nostril after it had stung me. FML
Today, my nose had been feeling weirdly uncomfortable all day. After I got home, I blew my nose really hard. I found that a bug had been resting inside my nose the entire time. FML
Today, I was sitting in the garden with a book, enjoying the fragrant summer breeze. That fragrance changed somewhat once my kittens discovered that the big mole hill next to me made an excellent toilet. FML
Today, a long day of work and a bad day for my mental health, I tried to relax with my wife, a movie, and a soda. After returning from using the bathroom, I took a swig to discover a particularly odorous stink bug had snuck into the can, now my mouth. FML
Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML
Today, I woke up by inhaling a fly up my nose, and feeling it twitching and slowly dying inside my nasal cavity. FML
Today, while outside, a bug flew up my nose. After I told my family and friends about a faint vibrating in my upper nostril, they all convinced me I was paranoid. That was until that night when I blew my nose and there was the bug in my tissue. Its leg was still twitching. FML
Today, while squishing a stink bug, it sprayed directly in my eye. FML
Today, due to the high pollen count and despite taking hay fever medicine, I passed out in the bathroom from not being able to breathe. My mother accused me of doing it on purpose to make her late for work. FML
Today, it's my wedding day. It was meant to be perfect. The bouquet, along with a high pollen count, set my hay fever off. I walked down the aisle in front of 200 people with streaming eyes and a runny nose; I then had a sneezing fit during my vows and blew a large snot bubble. Real attractive. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Ichigoner 0
Imagine the bugs. Today i was crawling peacefully on a flower until some idiot sucked me up his nose. FML
so_me_fml 0
...Maybe just gently inhale the scent instead of sucking it up to your brain?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (47)
Compwiz1993 0
You must have a powerful nose!
iKaite 0
'She's got a tongue like an electric eel and she likes the taste of a mans tonsils!'
KryptoniteKiss 0
Oh, yuck.
bayybee 0
disgusting. ew.
lich_fml 0
oh, yuck D:
EllieMolloy 2
I second that D:
Ichigoner 0
Imagine the bugs. Today i was crawling peacefully on a flower until some idiot sucked me up his nose. FML
Ichigoner 0
*her
divineinstrument 2
No one cares if a bug's life is ******. They're gross
mmmrabies 0
Lol, that was hilarious!
plexico 4
You coke *****! When you smell a flower, you don't inhale as hard as when you are snorting blow.
M13LO 0
YDI for having a nose
chocoLIFE_fml 2
haha make no sense...
CDub7888 0
And hark, here we have the genuine example of the fabled "asshole". A hermit of many sorts, one dare not come across the asshole because when one does, hostile urges begin to form.
HamsteronA 0
these "assholes" sound very scary. are they relatives of "trolls", "idiots", "grammer Nazis" and "twats"?
dRose22 0
YDI for not checking before smelling
Self_Induced 0
Sexy.
so_me_fml 0
...Maybe just gently inhale the scent instead of sucking it up to your brain?
gorguz14evar 0
rofl. So true !