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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 July 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2394
  • Number of comments : 265
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About jarrettd : Stuff, I like stuff, you like stuff, you like my stuff, thats all the stuff i have about me.
My opinion on the "you deserve it" button on FML is that it shouldn't exist. No one deserves pain or hardship, even if they walked right into it. If I happen to have the badge for it, just ignore my hypocrisy for badges.
The picture is courtesy of my uncle. It is his face after all. Look him up on youtube-carl's basement.
Disclaimer- things get pretty crazy in carl's side of town so be ready. For those who actually read this, good job and thanks. Now go read some more FMLs.

jarrettd's page activity

Visits<b>ebroks</b> - the 10/29/2016 at 9:10am<b>Kayouri</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 3:48pm<b>jdonofs</b> - the 09/17/2016 at 2:14pm<b>PCKid11</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 2:21pm<b>coolmike699</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 12:41pm<b>SilentDawg</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 3:38am<b>RENOFETT</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 5:08am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 9:10am<b>tomdrc12</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 9:57pm<b>jcoleinprogresz</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 12:45am<b>Terminato</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 9:37pm<b>turtles_yup</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 8:07pm<b>iamamale</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 10:52pm<b>Frozen_Flames</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 2:57pm<b>salii321</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 7:43am<b>Mightytall</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 3:05pm<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 10:56am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 3:54pm

Fucked!<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 3:11pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 9:46pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 1:24pm<b>vb68</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 6:33am<b>KaitTheBarber</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 6:36pm<b>_SpencerM_</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 3:37am<b>brittney242</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 3:19pm<b>kendoge</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 7:12am<b>_Hazmat</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 4:10am<b>apineapple</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 12:04am<b>cre8tvlylicnsd</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 9:56pm<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 9:01pm<b>Teckzilla</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:46pm<b>PleaseConfirm</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 5:12pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 6:18am<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 12:25am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 2:36pm<b>ragingatheist</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 1:04am

jarrettd's FML badges


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of jarrettd's badges

jarrettd's favorite FMLs

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

by pootie / 12/11/2013 at 8:14am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 12:53am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom visited. While she was using the bathroom, my man-child of a husband thought it would be funny to knock on the bathroom door with his penis, thinking it was me in there. She opened the door to find him standing there doing the "helicopter". FML

by LadyLola / 11/25/2013 at 12:22am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I was wearing a letterman jacket that had my school name and "Okinawa Japan" on the back. A high school kid walks up to me and says, "I can't forgive you people for bombing Pearl Harbor." I'm black. FML

by The_FN_Gunny / 10/29/2013 at 6:31pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to tackle my fear of heights by riding a rollercoaster. Once we were near the top, it malfunctioned, causing it to stop, and we all had to get out and climb back down. My girlfriend laughed at me for how scared I was. FML

by monsterdanceman / 10/23/2013 at 7:16pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend made bacon sandwiches for lunch. I didn't want to be rude, but I couldn't help but mention that the bacon smelled and tasted weird. I thought it may have expired. She said not to worry because she used the dry bacon under the counter. Those were dog treats. FML

by Undercooked / 09/24/2013 at 3:08pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2013 at 3:15am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML

by down trodden / 09/05/2013 at 3:45am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML

by hipster glasses / 08/16/2013 at 7:08am / United States / Work

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

by Oh-Shit! / 08/10/2013 at 11:23am / United States / Health

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

by Blood on my hands / 08/07/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Animals

Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML

by Neanderthals walk among us / 08/04/2013 at 3:09pm / Hungary (Budapest) / Work

Today, I had to remove a glass bottle, complete with an ineffective pullstring, from a patient's rectum. He claimed that he'd accidentally sat on it, and later threatened to sue me for every penny if I breathed a word of it to anyone. Oops, looks like I just did. FML

by DocKreso / 06/28/2013 at 5:59pm / Croatia (Splitsko-Dalmatinska) / Work

Today, while volunteering at a local museum, I politely told an elderly gentleman to have a nice day. He responded by yelling "NO" and storming off. Everyone looked at me like I was some sort of monster. FML

by me / 06/22/2013 at 5:16pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, after years of loaning my mother countless amounts of cash that never get paid back, borrowing $60 from her, and being just one day late paying it off due to food poisoning, she sends a very large man to my door to collect, like she's Tony Soprano. FML

by some people's parents / 04/18/2013 at 12:01am / United States (Colorado) / Money