Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

MrConcise

Online | Search for a member

MrConcise

45Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 14 December 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 6180
  • Number of comments : 780
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About MrConcise : ►► FML's Self-Proclaimed Resident Smartass Pseudointellectual

Though our troubles and woes are relentless and unforgiving, we may rejoice as we rekindle one another's flames to familiar vibrancy; we burn brightest with the strength of unity.

Popular opinion trumps logic every time.

It's unacceptable to justify your actions if the world doesn't like your answer.

Dear world, leave the bright colors to Skittles commercials and stop buying pants that make you look like a dweeb.

MrConcise's page activity

Visits<b>ironfey</b> - 10 hours ago<b>rinzler806</b> - 13 hours ago<b>PITSB</b> - 18 hours ago<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - 21 hours ago<b>kindasortayeah</b> - 22 hours ago<b>KinkyMissBinky</b> - yesterday at 5:08pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - yesterday at 12:28pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - yesterday at 12:23pm<b>karma_kicks_back</b> - yesterday at 12:59am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - yesterday at 12:17am<b>Wedees</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 1:33pm<b>constipation</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 12:53pm<b>dekomori</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 10:17pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 8:06pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:15pm<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 6:42pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 6:12pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 5:11pm

Liked!<b>RavingHaven</b> - yesterday at 5:28pm<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:42pm<b>ironfey</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 3:35pm<b>llalala</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 7:49am<b>jenny_sykes</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 9:26am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 2:39am<b>emmatheamazingx</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 6:00am<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 7:12am<b>sashakotlik</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 4:55am<b>xninix</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 6:50am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 5:20am<b>Shmatterhorn</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 10:29pm<b>Sassy_Kitten96</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 9:11pm<b>olivetree172</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 1:40am<b>silmisstar</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:24pm<b>kassia_1011</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:18pm<b>jenamalone</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 9:43pm<b>PopRock26</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 3:11pm

MrConcise's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

See all of MrConcise's badges

MrConcise's favorite FMLs

Today, I let my dog outside to play. He shat on three cars, played dead in the middle of the street, and chased my neighbors' cat into a pool. When he came back into the house, he had a note taped to his back saying "IOU 1 lawsuit". FML

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

#21167190
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57644) - you deserved it (6937)

On 06/08/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by 404: sense not found (man) - United States (California)

Today, my brain decided to go into suicide mode. So far I've managed to open a fridge door into my face, walk balls-first into the corner of a table, and sliced my finger while trying to cut open some thick plastic packaging with scissors. I'll probably be dead by the time this is posted. FML

#21165186
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48197) - you deserved it (5577)

On 06/06/2014 at 5:26pm - health - by FMyBrain (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42831) - you deserved it (6231)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, my long distance boyfriend told me no more nude pictures or sexting, as he's afraid the government will steal it all. FML

Today, an older gentleman came into my work for underwear. I helped him find his size, pulled out a pair of navy ones and he then turned to me and said, "I don't want dark colours because I can't tell if I've shit myself." He then continued looking for all the white pairs. FML

#21163612
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42539) - you deserved it (4455)

On 06/05/2014 at 4:11am - work - by unashamed - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my university considered it an "embarrassment" that I was going to be the first and only person to graduate from my engineering course, so they gave free passes to two guys who hadn't finished their thesis yet. They were congratulated in the newspaper; I wasn't. FML

Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML

#21159254
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63798) - you deserved it (9303)

On 06/01/2014 at 11:51am - intimacy - by help me - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my wife muttering "God, I want you so bad". Figuring she was either talking to me or longing for the second cumming of Christ, I turned over to see which. Turned out she was rubbing one out to some guy's Facebook photos on her phone. FML

#21157398
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61076) - you deserved it (6724)

On 05/30/2014 at 6:05pm - intimacy - by lahiros (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Turns out that bouncers don't think it's a problem for girls to go up on stage and make out with the musicians. FML

#21151747
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43946) - you deserved it (5361)

On 05/25/2014 at 11:34pm - misc - by Anothermoose - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me that the girl he really likes sees me as a threat. FML

#21149888
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49567) - you deserved it (4784)

On 05/24/2014 at 2:14am - love - by SE011194 - United States (Georgia)

Today, while lifeguarding, I slipped and fell from my chair and onto the cement. Embarrassed and actually quite hurt, I tried to climb back up to the chair, but it tipped. I fell half onto the cement half into the pool, just before the chair landed on top of me. FML

#21143534
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56321) - you deserved it (5649)

On 05/18/2014 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was hosting my daughter's thirteenth birthday party. One parent decided to stay at my house, the only parent to do so. The entire night she critiqued every decision I made, from the films to the cake. When it was time to open presents, her kid was the only one without one. FML

#21141320
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48306) - you deserved it (4016)

On 05/15/2014 at 11:15pm - kids - by madbirthdaymomma (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, I finally brought a girl home from college. While I was making her some coffee, my roommate came down in her underwear, pretended to be my girlfriend, and asked if we were having a threesome. My date left before I could explain, and my roommate thinks it's fucking hilarious. FML



FML's blog

  • Sidonie's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! In this week's edition, some pedalos, some kittens, a bunch of gypsy singers, some ponytails, a crooner, a house that looks like Hitler, a joke about George W. Bush's cocaine habit and a brilliant…

Thursday 19 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: