Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my parked car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop, all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML
Today, I got into an accident and my car was totaled. My friends then took me out to a bar for a drink to make me feel better. It appears that the police officer I'd spoken to had kept my I.D. by mistake and I couldn't get into the bar. FML
Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML
Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML
Today, I let my son drive us home. After just 10 feet, he crashed into a parked cop car. It was my squad car. FML
Today, I was eating whilst driving. I tried to stop sauce from spilling on the console and instead smashed into a parked car. FML
Today, I accidentally rear-ended an undercover police car. FML
Today, I went to a party to see my crush. He offered me a drink and I declined telling him that I don't drink because alcohol makes people act stupid and crash their cars. He then saw me back into a car parked on the street and shatter my backlights as I reversed from the driveway to go home. FML
Today, I bust my lip when a car bumped into mine. As I headed home, I was stopped by the police who told me my back light was out. I tried to explain, but it just came out as "fghjiljh" because of my lip. I was arrested on suspicion of drinking and driving. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thank you, your FML was submitted, and will appear the moderation soon!
Top comments
GuessWhatKids 13
Drugs are bad, mkay.
klc20071989_fml 20
If it was leaking antifreeze, then technically it was.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (239)
bReLiNg 18
Did the cop notice that you were eyeing your car funny?
rob02 19
wow
aimeecuria 9
Dont complain on FML, YDI, moral of the story, dont do acid
singer0421 32
FML was basically made for people complaining about their lives because their lives suck.
greenpixi 10
Would you explain to me what her doing acid had to do with get car getting smashed? Saying moral of the story implies that the bad thing in the story (her car getting totaled) was caused by her doing acid, which it wasn't. Taking to cops while tripping sucks, but it doesn't seem to be what people here are saying she "deserves".
ShinedownLuv 14
Was it completly the drunk drivers fault? I dont think you can drive safely while on acid
horneyhic 15
It reads like she wasn't driving so I'm gonna say a drunk hit her parked car
reeses_pieces12 7
At least you were out somewhere safe to indulge. Not your fault the other guy chose to get ****** up and still drive. I don't see anything wrong with making your own choices, regardless of whether they're right or not, as long as you're not harming others.
imtooshy 18
Really, how is THIS a fml for you?! Acid isn't cool, it's as dumb as drinking and driving. I hope this experience smartened you up somewhat.
flashback.miss 28
How could you not deserve this?!
ApollosMyth 22
Oh you know, since it was in no way the OP's fault that their car got totalled.
Korosuhito 26
Hope the trip was worth the fall.
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
I thought that was a clever response 25. guess others didn't.. oh well thumbs up on my side. :)
Pandacupcakelove 26
Well that was easy! I only had to read the first 4 words to know which button I should click... YDI, my friend.
SuperDanielNL 23
So much for being objective and not judgemental. I see the FML is devided on the subject of drugs.
Pandacupcakelove 26
I'm just saying everybody knows what drugs are and that they only lead to trouble. If you do drugs anyway, I'm not going to feel bad for you.
greenpixi 10
Hmm.. Tell that to the guy who figured out the double helix nature of DNA....on acid. And Carl Sagan, who made many of his observations regarding politics and the universe while high on marijuana.
greenpixi 10
*Politics = physics
SuperDanielNL 23
What drugs are... I have to assume that people who say this honestly don't know what "drugs" are. I mean there is a myraid of substances, some more harmfull than others but just saying all drugs ruin your life is plain ignorant. I mean even caffiene is in essence a drug.
tehdarkness 21
Ooh that's the worst!! Weird stuff always seems to happen when you do acid...