Work: Today, I found out the record label I was talking to was actually... - FML

By Anonymous - 10/07/2014 05:24 - United States - Stockton

Today, I found out the record label I was talking to was actually just my friends who have way too much time on their hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 108

You deserved it 5 681

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Same thing different taste

By ISwearImNotOCD - 05/04/2017 08:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I found out that the chefs at my work can't spell for shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 153

You deserved it 371

Lonely hearts

By Lena - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Germany

Today, my life became a lot more depressing. A while ago, some friends and I founded a "Forever Alone" club, because all of us were single at that time. I'm now the only member left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 717

You deserved it 3 199

By Rumors - 12/12/2013 11:27 - United States - Turtle Lake

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 666

You deserved it 6 100

Dogsbody

By tee - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Kansas City

Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 882

You deserved it 2 012

By confsused - 16/12/2013 17:49 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 941

You deserved it 3 372

Early warning

By Hreyes - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I overheard my boss stressing out over finding a replacement for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 007

You deserved it 2 215

Sketchy

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Austria

Today, I discovered that my ex-girlfriend, who I dated for 6 years, is getting engaged to my friend. The very same "friend" who's been encouraging me to break up with her for the past year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 575

You deserved it 3 192

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By Hit-and-Run - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Mexico - Juárez

Today, after an extensive talk with a relationship counselor, we concluded that I'm more likely to get run over by a car than be in a stable relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 349

You deserved it 3 274

Record breakers

By fatmom - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Royal Tunbridge Wells

Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 578

You deserved it 21 556

By thatonekid - 27/07/2009 23:10 - United States

Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 474

You deserved it 3 545

Next

Top comments

mpkpm 19

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:46

So did you tell them about your hit new single, all my friends are dicks?

91hayek 31

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:43

There is another FML where a guy's father pretended to be a publisher that had accepted his manuscript. Sorry OP, insecure people like to pull down those that are making an effort with their lives. Keep your head up.

Comments

MisterEx 28

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:38

Off the record, consider it a rehearsal!

wildsweetchild 19

Thursday 10 July 2014 22:26

Cruel of friends to do that, but great advise to see the positive in everything. :)

myGRAM 14

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:41

Too*

nana_star 27

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:41

Bravo

_parth 20

Thursday 10 July 2014 13:51

2

Kamon97 23

Thursday 10 July 2014 16:10

A wild swaggot appears!

Rallred32 20

Thursday 10 July 2014 16:57

Wow. What is WRONG with this thread?

91hayek 31

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:43

There is another FML where a guy's father pretended to be a publisher that had accepted his manuscript. Sorry OP, insecure people like to pull down those that are making an effort with their lives. Keep your head up.

sjbartholome 14

Friday 11 July 2014 13:58

right because playing a joke on your friend = insecurity

mpkpm 19

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:46

So did you tell them about your hit new single, all my friends are dicks?

MrSassypants 32

Thursday 10 July 2014 16:34

"All my friends are dicks I said all my friends are dicks All they ever do is make me sick They pull a prank just to get a kick Because all my friends are *inhale deeply* ddddiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicks!"

Awesome_Ninjaz 12

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:50

Brilliant!

Lil_Red777 21

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:51

Not very good ones apparently.

christian1509 21

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:56

Well, time to start plotting your revenge

DocBastard 38

Thursday 10 July 2014 12:58

The fact that the label name was "Gullible Records" should have tipped you off.

christian1509 21

Thursday 10 July 2014 13:02

I'm gunna go ahead and say terrible friends, and who has the time to do that anyways?

lolnoodles 3

Thursday 10 July 2014 13:16

REVENGEEEEE so what are u gonna do to them

Brandi_Faith 33

Thursday 10 July 2014 17:43

But sometimes Karma takes years and you're not even around them to see it by then.

Chibi_Kitten 24

Friday 11 July 2014 6:24

#27 Sometimes Karma means you have to take it into your own hands. Karma won't get those friends unless OP has a hand in it.

Keywords

Love Awkward Relatable Students Work Racism Health Cheating Pregnancy Relationship advice Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Sex Intimacy Revenge Food Animals Cats Boredom Management Kids Parenting Sexism Parents Miscellaneous Weird Job interview Social Media Jealousy

The Top

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 680

You deserved it 7 123

Today, it's been a week since my mother died. She had no life insurance and was over $20,000 in debt, plus her hospital/funeral bills. My father wants nothing to do with me as she was a one night stand and he never paid child support. I'm behind on rent and bills because I'm injured from work. Thanks for nothing, mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 143

The Top

Today, I'm single, as all the girls I’ve ever liked are either taken or hate my guts, and even if you don’t tell her, another girl would feel it, as if she’s a fifth choice at best, and might not like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 244

You deserved it 843

TToday, my daughter was hungover, so to teach her a lesson I started banging a pot next to her ear. An hour later, we’re in hospital. She wasn’t hungover; she hadn’t even been drinking. Her migraine was a huge aneurism one sneeze away from bursting and killing her instantly. I’m a terrible dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 2 444

Today, after falling head over heels for a guy I've been crushing on for the past few months; I discovered that he's gay, dislikes children and I stand absolutely no chance. This isn't even the first time this has happened. I have the worst gaydar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 261

Today, I was hanging out with my neighbor. He asked me if I wanted to play Twister, and I said no because I thought it would be weird. What was his response? "C'mon. You can leave if it gets sexual". FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 457

You deserved it 2 185

Today, I started a new job that was highly recommended by a worker there. The same coworker that is now making my life a living hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 733

You deserved it 818

Today, I was trying to help a very slow-witted client over the phone. After a while, I realised he was just delaying while pleasuring himself to the sound of my voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 608

You deserved it 4 083