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Today, after handing out several résumés for several jobs, I realized that I forgot to add my phone number to them. FML

#19188907
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9127) - you deserved it (27269)

On 02/29/2012 at 1:21pm - work - by tammylauraine - United States

Today, I was having a debate with my friend, who actually believes karma is real. He got very angry with me and stormed off, tripping over his own feet in the process. I laughed and asked what he'd done in a past life to deserve that one. He responded by getting up and punching me. FML

#19750799
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9126) - you deserved it (33899)

On 06/07/2012 at 5:26pm - health - by sh3n-D (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, after I had finished vacuuming, I ripped the cord out of the outlet and it hit me in the face cutting both my top and bottom lip. FML

#5980515
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9123) - you deserved it (30772)

On 10/24/2009 at 8:41pm - work - by Clutz (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally met the cute guy I've been seeing around town. Bad news is, I was drunk off my ass, and when he told me his name, I burst out laughing because it's the same as my puppy's. He did not take it well. FML

#18374674
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9119) - you deserved it (32449)

On 11/28/2011 at 10:31am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, I decided to try whitening my teeth for the first time. I applied the strips to my teeth and decided to lay down and wait for the thirty required minutes to pass. I accidentally fell asleep and woke up three hours later. My teeth are still in excruciating pain and are covered in white streaks. FML

#6841945
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9114) - you deserved it (29285)

On 12/20/2009 at 2:52am - health - by nikko blue - United States (California)

Today, my varsity swim team got second place in the State meet. My coach said I could bring the trophy home for the weekend. On the way home, I accidentally sat on it and broke it, cutting my butt. FML

#13319257
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9112) - you deserved it (31213)

On 10/04/2010 at 6:11pm - misc - by kat101 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my mom asked me if I had any plans to go out tonight. To divert attention, I pretended to be angry and accused her of prying into my social life. Actually, I have no social life and nobody to go out with. My only "big plans" were to finish my Sudoku book. FML

#20023891
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9112) - you deserved it (19832)

On 08/16/2012 at 2:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML

#9117281
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9108) - you deserved it (35530)

On 03/15/2010 at 10:27pm - misc - by hiii. (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my new iPhone was stolen from my school locker. After canceling my service, sobbing, having my mom yell at the secretary for their lack of security and finally agreeing to change to a private school, I found it in the corner of my locker. FML

#16583197
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9105) - you deserved it (73235)

On 06/09/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he tried to put his hand inside my pants. I didn't want it to be that easy so I denied, but he insisted a lot and I finally let him. He started to sing "We Are The Champions." FML

#7020893
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9104) - you deserved it (19427)

On 12/29/2009 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by queen (woman) - Brazil (Minas Gerais)

Today, I was offered to attend a Buddhist ceremony by one of my regular customers. Not wanting to offend the couple, I made an excuse about have a project for oceanography. Surprise, the husband is an oceanographer and wants to help me with my imaginary project. Karma much? FML

#5443877
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9103) - you deserved it (44884)

On 09/24/2009 at 5:50am - work - by whatproject (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I had to drive 300 miles to a town where I thought I'd forgotten my purse the night before. When I got to the hotel I had been staying at, I found out it was actually in the trunk of my car. FML

#11088527
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9097) - you deserved it (40476)

On 06/09/2010 at 8:46pm - misc - by Caitlin - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I went Christmas shopping for my cat. I still haven't bought presents for my family, yet my cat already has several small gifts under the tree and an outfit to wear around the house. I really need a new hobby. FML

#20397631
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9097) - you deserved it (27805)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:04am - animals - by catlover - Australia (Victoria)



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