Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML

#21492006
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22283) - you deserved it (1473)

On 11/13/2015 at 7:34am - misc - by Anonymousse (man) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, I realized I have more in common with a cantaloupe than I do with my boyfriend. FML

#19562059
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22281) - you deserved it (4915)

On 05/02/2012 at 2:16am - love - by muddled (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got pulled into a conversation about my 62 year old boss's new breast implants. FML

#19354471
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22278) - you deserved it (2218)

On 03/26/2012 at 10:36pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I learned that the only way to get my boyfriend to respond to me is through nudes. FML

Today, I had just had a shower, when I noticed that the mix of my shower gel and deodorant smelled like Lynx Dark Temptation. I was happy, as this is my favourite men's deodorant, until I realised I was happily sniffing my own boobs because they smelled like my ex-boyfriend. FML

Today, I learned that it takes about half an hour to get melted cheese out of your hair. FML

#17956536
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22272) - you deserved it (5792)

On 10/10/2011 at 11:34pm - health - by jzappe - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that when the man living in the house behind me thinks no one in the surrounding area is home, he likes to take his laundry off the line wearing nothing but a pair of sandals. FML

#18923298
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22266) - you deserved it (2534)

On 01/27/2012 at 6:19am - misc - by disturbedtosaytheleast (woman) - Canada

Today, my 20-year-old son's external hard-drive stopped working. He's crying on my shoulder now, not because of the movies, porn, work, or music he probably lost, but because of the now irretrievable complete series of Digimon that he'd collected. FML

#19629941
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22266) - you deserved it (4036)

On 05/15/2012 at 11:05pm - misc - by OytoBeAfather (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I wanted nothing more than to go home and get into bed. While I was unlocking my front door, the flimsy key snapped off inside the lock. A locksmith was called out, who did nothing but sadistically guffaw at my misfortune and crack sarcastic jokes as he undid the lock. FML

#20399681
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22264) - you deserved it (2498)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I woke up at 7, got to college by 7:40 to receive an email that my 8:00 a.m. class got cancelled. I stayed there until 12:00 p.m. for my second class, to then find out that the cancelled class was the one at 12:00, not 8:00. FML

#21491152
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22264) - you deserved it (5496)

On 11/11/2015 at 7:18am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I called a doctor's office for a referral. I was in public, so when she asked me what type of issue I had, I mumbled that I had a vaginal issue. After painstakingly having to repeat this several times, she said she was asking what kind of insurance I have. FML

#21485084
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22263) - you deserved it (4119)

On 10/27/2015 at 4:16pm - health - by Jess -

Today, my little sister asked me to open a jar of pickles for her. I struggled a little until the lid busted open, and pickle juice poured over my pocket and the iPhone inside. My sister then sniffed the jar, made a disgusted face, and ran out. FML

#20444015
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22261) - you deserved it (3622)

On 01/05/2013 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my flatmate was listening to opera on full volume all afternoon and now he's playing James Bond on the trumpet. FML

#621
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22260) - you deserved it (3058)

On 12/29/2008 at 1:09am - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: