Tuesday 29 January 2013 
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Today, I had to have major oral surgery. Needless to say I am in need of some heavy pain medication. My pharmacist insists that my surgeon never called in my medicine, and my surgeon insists otherwise. This has been going back and forth for hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21741) - you deserved it (1107)
On 01/28/2013 at 4:18pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, the new manager at my workplace left early in a panic, exclaiming, "My grandma had an accident! I need to see if she's okay!" I was left in charge of the bar once again. This is the sixth time this week his grandma has had an "accident". FML
I agree, your life sucks (21590) - you deserved it (1490)
On 02/02/2013 at 9:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my loyalty and regularity at my local pizza place were noticed. The delivery guy, when bringing yet another order, asked me if the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were living with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21499) - you deserved it (7534) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/31/2013 at 7:26am - misc - by heallven - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was given a wedgie by a complete stranger in a crowded bar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21493) - you deserved it (2354)
On 02/03/2013 at 8:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had a half-hour conversation with my parents about going to college. I don't know what's worse, that they were trying to talk me out of it or that they're convinced that I'm going to get knocked up and drop out by the end of my freshman year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21463) - you deserved it (2068)
On 02/04/2013 at 2:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I was running late for work and quickly grabbed my outfit from the dryer. I heard the crackling of static as I took out my shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when my co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to my back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21295) - you deserved it (5071)
On 02/03/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I went for a checkup after having recently been fitted with dental implants. The oral surgeon I chose was supposedly the best in the area, but it turns out that he inserted the implants at the wrong angle. Now I have to have further surgery to correct it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21207) - you deserved it (1938)
On 01/31/2013 at 4:29pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, as I was walking to my car, I noticed a car with a tail light out. Trying to be a good citizen, I walked up to the driver's side door and said "excuse me". The lady then maced me through the open window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21153) - you deserved it (2134)
On 02/05/2013 at 12:45pm - health - by maced face - United States
Today, my pants ripped while I was at work. I had to keep my balls to the wall while I dodged customers and edged ever closer to the break room. Before I could call my wife and ask her to bring a new pair, my boss burst in, got pissed, and made me go back out and deal with irate customers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21056) - you deserved it (1717)
On 01/31/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by fuckit (man) - Italy (Lazio)
Today, working as a nurse, I saw a patient in for follow-up after a partial leg amputation. I checked her blood pressure and gave her the reading, which prompted her husband to ask what it meant. She replied, "I'm alive." Before I could stop myself, "And kicking" spilled out of my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21009) - you deserved it (7561)
On 02/04/2013 at 10:30pm - health - by facepalm - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I ran into a former co-worker who I hadn't seen in years. She was raving at how I hadn't aged a bit, but before I could thank her she said, "But, you know, chubby people age better." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20931) - you deserved it (2191)
On 02/04/2013 at 7:17am - work - by Colleen Nichols - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I spun off the road and into a ditch. The insurance company told me I'd have to wait an hour, as they had other cars to tow first. I had to pee so badly that I resorted to using the only thing I had in my car: a plastic bag. That's when I got a knock on my window from the tow truck driver. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20916) - you deserved it (3843)
On 02/02/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by merp. (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I decided at age 18 that it's time to put into storage the picture books that have been collecting dust in my room for nearly a decade. My mother took this as a sign that I'm planning to move out and abandon her forever, and has been crying for the last four hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20787) - you deserved it (1548)
On 02/02/2013 at 7:52pm - kids - by NeverEscaping (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Monday 17 June 2013
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