Sunday 9 December 2012 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I wanted nothing more than to go home and get into bed. While I was unlocking my front door, the flimsy key snapped off inside the lock. A locksmith was called out, who did nothing but sadistically guffaw at my misfortune and crack sarcastic jokes as he undid the lock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14391) - you deserved it (1556)
On 12/14/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, I finally felt motivated to do some exercise. As I got my weights out, I noticed out of the corner of my eye someone moving about outside my window. I got scared and dropped a weight on my foot. The person outside was my own reflection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14238) - you deserved it (7493)
On 12/07/2012 at 4:10pm - health - by i see fat people (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14223) - you deserved it (2947)
On 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by oh gee, you don't say (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14186) - you deserved it (5012)
On 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE (man) - United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham)
Today, after weeks of begging, I finally got an interview at my dream job. Turns out, they only agreed to interview me because they thought I was someone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14074) - you deserved it (1053)
On 12/11/2012 at 12:07pm - work - by karachii - United States
Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14040) - you deserved it (1368)
On 12/03/2012 at 2:17am - misc - by Stupendous_ - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I announced to my coworkers that I'd "fixed the massive problem" they'd all been complaining about. Eleven different people made guesses at what the problem had been, ranging from how bad I smell to if I had learned to brush my teeth. I just meant that I'd fixed the coffee machine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13719) - you deserved it (6623)
On 12/11/2012 at 10:50pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, after telling my young kids all about Santa, his reindeer and his sleigh, we saw him. Smoking a cigarette in the beat-up car next to ours at a red light. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13713) - you deserved it (2626)
On 12/05/2012 at 11:50am - kids - by JessThompson - Canada (Ontario)
Today, in the midst of his ongoing mid-life crisis, my dad forced me to accompany him for some father-son bonding. The bonding involved me driving us away at high speed after he gleefully hurled a bucket of paint all over a store window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13709) - you deserved it (1274)
On 12/14/2012 at 6:20pm - misc - by theslutmuncher (man) - Germany (Sachsen-Anhalt)
Today, I walked into school confident about the new hair color I'd had done over the weekend. My drama teacher apparently dyed her hair the same color; everyone noticed and thought I'd copied her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13685) - you deserved it (1268)
On 12/04/2012 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was pulled over and administered a sobriety test due to an officer's suspicion that I was driving under the influence. I was completely sober, and, apparently, I suck at driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13344) - you deserved it (7738)
On 12/16/2012 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my girlfriend showed me a print of a Banksy that she'd just bought, telling me it was an original. When I tried to argue that it wasn't, she broke up with me for "implying she was a moron." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13323) - you deserved it (1651)
On 12/04/2012 at 11:17am - love - by Single (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)
Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13164) - you deserved it (1677)
On 12/03/2012 at 12:18am - health - by Gahh... (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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