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Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend sent me so many nice texts that he made me fall in love with him that little bit more. It turns out he was sweetening me up before telling me he cheated on me the night before. FML

#20192047
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31182) - you deserved it (2370)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:29am - love - by brokenhearted (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloaded a picture of a huge, hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone, as every time I try, the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML

#20200411
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31165) - you deserved it (6141)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by skinnybitch (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML

#20189453
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31061) - you deserved it (3815)

On 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had the pleasure of finding out how it feels to poop with 3 broken ribs. FML

#20398877
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30833) - you deserved it (2029)

On 12/14/2012 at 1:44am - health - by mysidesaresplitting - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friend was complaining to me about her problems. I tried to be a good, understanding friend, listening and giving advice. When it was my turn to vent, she interrupted me, saying, "Sorry, but I don't really care." FML

#20201674
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30813) - you deserved it (2465)

On 12/12/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by sushichick (woman) - United States

Today, I was snooping around in my parents' closet to see what I would get for Christmas, when I came across a UPS package. It was the video game I ordered off eBay 3 weeks ago, addressed to me. They told me it had never arrived and said I should ask Santa to bring it to me. FML

#20195835
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30670) - you deserved it (4677)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally got my wedding photos in the mail. As I looked through them, I soon realized that the lace material on my wedding dress was completely see-through in the sunlight, and my bra and panties were visible in every single outdoor photo. I had an outdoor wedding. FML

#20397769
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30506) - you deserved it (8461)

On 12/13/2012 at 9:35am - misc - by AboutToGoKillBillOnSomeone (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30487) - you deserved it (6405)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML

#20200046
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30304) - you deserved it (2910)

On 12/11/2012 at 2:15am - kids - by n1a1t1h1a1n1 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

#20189170
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30251) - you deserved it (3965)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

#20197527
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30251) - you deserved it (1779)

On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, in history class, we were talking about Ancient Rome, and what childbirth would have been like back then. One girl asked in all seriousness why they didn't use ultrasound machines to see what sex their babies were. I have to deal with people like this on a daily basis. FML

#20398310
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30119) - you deserved it (1964)

On 12/13/2012 at 6:44pm - misc - by surrounded by dumbfucks (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29952) - you deserved it (17158)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States



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