Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32632) - you deserved it (1257)
On 07/15/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (29008) - you deserved it (3192)
On 07/14/2012 at 8:50pm - intimacy - by checkup (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)
Today, in the middle of my online midterm, my computer decided to update and closed out of the test. It can't be retaken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28956) - you deserved it (2671)
On 07/12/2012 at 12:08pm - misc - by failure - United States (Minnesota)
Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28633) - you deserved it (2350)
On 07/15/2012 at 7:13pm - kids - by Zora (man) - Norway (Hordaland)
Today, while I was walking home alone, a homeless man approached me and took me by the hand. Apparently, he's been watching me for weeks and has fallen madly in love with me. He told me not to worry, though; he's not a rapist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26725) - you deserved it (1442)
Today, my boyfriend treated me to a surprise romantic dinner, and got me a huge balloon bouquet, a dozen roses, a beautiful card for my birthday. Too bad it's his ex's birthday and not mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26532) - you deserved it (1579)
On 07/11/2012 at 1:09am - love - by forgottenbday (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26418) - you deserved it (1970)
On 07/12/2012 at 4:35pm - misc - by LetItRip - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)
Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26370) - you deserved it (27667)
On 07/15/2012 at 1:34am - intimacy - by oops - United States
Today, I went to a movie with this guy. He was late so the only seats available were the ones in the very front which he refused to sit in. As we were looking for two seats, he spotted one near the back and sat down, leaving me to sit by myself in the front. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25940) - you deserved it (2016)
On 07/16/2012 at 12:21am - love - by BC94 (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25657) - you deserved it (2935)
On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my brother had a party with over 60 people in my basement. It turns out that five different couples had sex under the same comforter. The comforter was mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23522) - you deserved it (1871)
On 07/11/2012 at 9:29am - intimacy - by Sherry - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was finally leaving my hometown to live in my dream city. Everything was packed, keys were handed in, goodbyes were made. The moment my truck began pulling out to get underway, the guy I had gotten a room from in my new city called to inform me that he decided to rent to someone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22600) - you deserved it (1264)
On 07/10/2012 at 1:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend told me that my vagina looks like Yoda. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22355) - you deserved it (3494)
On 07/15/2012 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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