Today, neither of my parents fought for my custody. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43210) - you deserved it (2315)
On 06/10/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by Anon - United States
Today, I saw a text message on my husband's phone from a "Candice", asking him if he and his wife are still separated, followed by an invitation to spend the night. I never knew we were separated in the first place. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31619) - you deserved it (1839)
On 06/04/2012 at 2:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)
Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29432) - you deserved it (5138)
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot in the bedroom. Her phone rang and she stopped to have an hour long conversation with her ex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27654) - you deserved it (2575)
On 06/08/2012 at 9:26am - intimacy - by unamyous - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, saying he had to move away to be with his dad, who's just been diagnosed with cancer. After talking to his sister, I discovered that not only is his dad healthy, he's not moving away either; he's just gotten back with his ex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26319) - you deserved it (1507)
On 06/10/2012 at 3:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)
Today, my boss became obsessed with a movie about a pimp. He now refers to all my female coworkers as his "bitches" and refuses to treat us like human beings. Whenever we make a mistake, he rolls his eyes and laughs, "So typical of a prostie." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26224) - you deserved it (2075)
On 06/04/2012 at 11:47pm - work - by kufan1324 - United States
Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25691) - you deserved it (3908)
On 06/07/2012 at 1:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24749) - you deserved it (2157)
On 06/04/2012 at 12:34am - misc - by whattheheck - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents at her sister's play. The moment I introduced myself, I realized that her father was my probation officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24698) - you deserved it (13468)
On 06/10/2012 at 5:16am - love - by fernie vazquez - United States (California)
Today, I found out through Instagram that the guy I'm dating has a wife and two kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24550) - you deserved it (3082)
On 06/09/2012 at 2:43pm - love - by hailsatan666 (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24367) - you deserved it (3291)
On 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm - health - by LaurenB (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23365) - you deserved it (3521)
On 06/10/2012 at 12:13am - intimacy - by rachiej8 - United States (Vermont)
Today, I went to the circus with my family. When we were looking at the animals during the break, an elephant took my purse with his trunk and ate it. It crushed my cellphone, camera, keys and wallet. After that, the circus director yelled at me for feeding poisonous stuff to his elephant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22518) - you deserved it (4117)
On 06/11/2012 at 3:14am - animals - by ILoveAnimals (woman) - Austria (Wien)
Monday 20 May 2013
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