Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

January 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend told me that her fear of PDA has gotten so bad, she doesn't think she'll even be able to kiss me on our wedding day. Her parents are going be there and she can't imagine showing affection in front of other people, let alone her parents. FML

#21342878
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29875) - you deserved it (2632)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:09pm - love - by uggg - United States (Washington)

Today, my sister got her retouched wedding photos. Apparently one of the things she had the professional do was edit me out of them. FML

#21341567
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29873) - you deserved it (2226)

On 01/21/2015 at 11:26am - misc - by kana__ (woman) - Japan

Today, my brother admitted that he decides whether he will date a girl or not based on the number of likes she gets on her selfies. We share the same blood. FML

#21332081
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29823) - you deserved it (2937)

On 01/06/2015 at 3:36pm - misc - by Discouraged (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got reprimanded by my boss for saying "It's a stab in the dark, though." According to him, it's a euphemism for anal sex and I was being offensive to a gay colleague, the same one who kept insisting it was no problem. I got written up anyway. FML

#21330417
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29795) - you deserved it (1989)

On 01/04/2015 at 1:52am - work - by boss stabber (man) - United States (California)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging about me to his friends, telling them I have a great smile, cute hair, and very perky tits. This wouldn't be so bad if we weren't both men. FML

#21333775
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29714) - you deserved it (6090)

On 01/09/2015 at 4:11am - love - by pitytitty (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying on a shirt and asked my boyfriend if he liked it. He replied, "If I say no, can we still have sex tonight?" FML

#21336880
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29685) - you deserved it (5665)

On 01/14/2015 at 8:58am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got a large envelope from a college I applied to earlier. My mom, expecting big news, made my family gather round as I opened it. It ended up being a letter of rejection from not just that school, but all 3 campuses of the state college. FML

#21342027
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29650) - you deserved it (2305)

On 01/22/2015 at 12:22am - misc - by 1415926 - United States

Today, my husband came home, drunk and with lipstick smeared on his face. When I confronted him about it, he just slurred, "Ah don't worry babe, it ain't mine." FML

#21343515
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29640) - you deserved it (2273)

On 01/24/2015 at 3:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my professor was doing roll-call. As usual, she didn't say my name because it's so close to the person before me. So to differentiate, she decided she would call the girl before me "the pretty one". FML

#21341880
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29610) - you deserved it (2104)

On 01/21/2015 at 9:17pm - misc - by The Ugly One - United States

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29567) - you deserved it (4213)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, while at work at a call center, I got a call from an elderly man who needed a new credit card because he'd accidentally cut up his own card instead of his wife's. Trying to be funny, I said "Trying to keep her in line, eh?" Turns out his wife had just died. FML

Today, a council worker showed up on my doorstep for the final pool installation inspection, which was scheduled 10 years ago. FML

#21336247
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29542) - you deserved it (1987)

On 01/13/2015 at 3:28am - misc - by livingstonjamie - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my scumbag landlady broke into my place and stole my mop, which I refused to give her earlier. She denied everything and tried to convince me that some criminal broke in using a key, stole only my mop, and was nice enough to lock up on the way out. FML

#21332650
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29537) - you deserved it (2331)

On 01/07/2015 at 11:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Sri Lanka



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: