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September 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having sex. He first excused himself to the bathroom, then returned with a sad face saying he had fumbled with himself in the bathroom to get "ready" and accidentally came. He said, "I was thinking of you though." FML

Today, I was working at the daycare. As I left with my boyfriend, a kid came up to us and said that my boyfriend could do way better. FML

#21251155
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35526) - you deserved it (3241)

On 09/03/2014 at 1:40pm - kids - by unlucky - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend takes videos of me sleeping and watches them with her friends. FML

#21250632
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35456) - you deserved it (3176)

On 09/02/2014 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was punched in the face because my uncontrollable hiccups were "annoying". FML

#21250817
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35419) - you deserved it (3809)

On 09/02/2014 at 10:13pm - health - by soccer8goalie - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35353) - you deserved it (9214)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized how truly insecure I really am, when the guy in the show I'm watching looked straight into the camera and I immediately looked away. FML

#21253498
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35300) - you deserved it (4699)

On 09/07/2014 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, someone in my class referred to the September 11th attacks as "Nine-Elevs". FML

#21255951
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35279) - you deserved it (2820)

On 09/10/2014 at 9:47pm - misc - by no - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

Today, after returning from taking my sister off to college, my parents told me that our house would be a lot quieter with my sister gone. Not because she's loud, but because she has friends and I apparently don't. FML

#21252132
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35141) - you deserved it (3142)

On 09/04/2014 at 10:59pm - misc - by AllieG33 - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

#21257016
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35077) - you deserved it (2916)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got more pleasure from itching the bed bug bites from sleeping over at my boyfriend's house than I got from actually sleeping with him. FML

#21255435
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35059) - you deserved it (4753)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:38pm - love - by Itchy Missy (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out I'm allergic to our new cat. My mom said she'd rather get rid of me than the cat. FML

Today, I went on Facebook, only to see my grandpa had posted "feeling horny" with my grandma. FML

#21261512
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34969) - you deserved it (3347)

On 09/19/2014 at 10:27pm - misc - by failingdaily - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)



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