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August 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boss bitched me out for violating workplace privacy, after he found an FML post from last year that eerily resembled a situation that happened the same year. He thought I posted it and twisted things to make him look like an idiot. I've never posted here in my life. FML

#21458477
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24832) - you deserved it (2246)

On 08/20/2015 at 1:48pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, I saw a huge wolf spider in my room. It ran off and hid before I could kill it, but after two hours looking for it then giving up, I finally found it, with my foot, as I put on my shoes. FML

#21453669
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24690) - you deserved it (2064)

On 08/08/2015 at 11:10pm - animals - by terrified (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while at work, I mustered up the courage to talk to a cute girl. I asked her name, to which I replied with mine and that it was nice to meet her. She followed up with a dirty look and the fact she hates anyone with my name. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend I was scared to open up to him because I had lost people in the past by doing so. After an hour of him trying to convince me to share my thoughts with him, I finally agreed to tell him some things that were worrying me. He broke up with me a minute later. FML

#21454874
101 comments

Today, a guy asked me out on Facebook, then called me a conceited bitch when I said no. I don't know, dude; maybe it's just that I already have a boyfriend, that you asked me out on Facebook, and that you posted the same message on 4 other girls' walls as well. FML

#21457386
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24515) - you deserved it (1561)

On 08/17/2015 at 11:39pm - misc - by sonice (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my drill sergeant was yelling at me and asking me questions. I got a question wrong, and he asked me if I am a "Shit Sandwich". I replied "Yes sir, with extra cheese." I'm running miles till the day I die. FML

#21457342
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24503) - you deserved it (8937)

On 08/17/2015 at 9:55pm - work - by BarhydtBran - United States (California)

Today, after ranting to my best friend about how all our friends are having kids and how teenage pregnancy will ruin their lives, she announced to me that she's pregnant. FML

#21452790
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24350) - you deserved it (5735)

On 08/06/2015 at 3:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my cousin's husband argued adamantly that the Earth doesn't rotate, and treated me like an idiot when I explained why he was wrong. Not even a video from space of the Earth rotating convinced him. This idiot is a teacher. FML

#21460521
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24344) - you deserved it (1458)

On 08/25/2015 at 1:33pm - misc - by Schizomaniac (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wasn't feeling our two-month relationship was up to par with his parents' 30-year marriage, and, furthermore, I wasn't similar enough to his mother. FML

#21452087
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24299) - you deserved it (1905)

On 08/05/2015 at 2:13am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, on my second day at my new job, a customer called my manager with a complaint about me. He said I put the cheese "upside down" on his sandwich, and that made it taste bad. FML

Today, my 4-year-old son's daycare called because he kissed a few girls. They explained he can't walk up and kiss little girls. I thought the situation was under control, until I was called an hour later to remove him from the premises for kissing little boys. FML

#21455715
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24223) - you deserved it (2431)

On 08/13/2015 at 7:50pm - kids - by stressedmom36 - United States (Florida)

Today, while shaving in the shower, my mother banged on the bathroom door to tell me something, right as I went to shave under my left armpit, causing me to jump and cut open my nipple. FML

#21451832
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24193) - you deserved it (1840)

On 08/04/2015 at 4:56pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, a woman drove her car onto my closed worksite. Since it is hazardous for the general public, I told her to leave. Later, the police arrived and gave me hell. Apparently, I was reported for being "snippy". FML

#21455499
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24132) - you deserved it (1489)

On 08/13/2015 at 5:58am - work - by SteamLass765 (woman) -



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