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January 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I learned that when a man in the row in front of you at a movie theater tells you to shut up, you shouldn't tell him to fuck off. He might be 6'4 with a short temper. FML

#21337906
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13780) - you deserved it (44052)

On 01/15/2015 at 10:15pm - misc - by whoops.. (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I fell asleep curling my bangs. I now look like Mrs. Potato head. FML

#21345701
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13406) - you deserved it (8777)

On 01/28/2015 at 5:20pm - misc - by WildShortstop13 - United States (South Dakota)

Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML

#21344889
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12776) - you deserved it (22363)

On 01/27/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by katrina2d (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. In the middle of it he said, "I want us to be covalent bonds". I didn't understand what he meant, and he actually stopped to explain it to me. FML

#21346746
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12341) - you deserved it (3347)

On 01/30/2015 at 10:11am - intimacy - by Chemist-why (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

#21346857
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10166) - you deserved it (924)

On 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my friend to download Frozen for me, because my mom wanted to play it for family movie night. The movie was shit, but it got even worse halfway through, when it cut to hardcore porn and a text bar saying "umad?" Now I'm grounded, and my "friend" is a legend for his prank. FML

#21346882
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9856) - you deserved it (1877)

On 01/30/2015 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my sister asked me how my boyfriend was doing. He died two years ago. She was the first person I told. FML

#21346806
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9792) - you deserved it (672)

On 01/30/2015 at 1:11pm - misc - by lonesomegal (woman) - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of sex with my boyfriend, my visiting brother knocked on the door saying he'd want to hear the details later. My boyfriend said, "Sure", and kept going. FML

#21346952
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6763) - you deserved it (664)

On 01/30/2015 at 6:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, a booklet came in the mail, addressed to me and titled "How To Train Your Wife". I didn't order it but my wife doesn't believe me. FML

#21346949
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6624) - you deserved it (499)

On 01/30/2015 at 6:28pm - love - by briang959 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend ran off with my beloved dog. Why? Yesterday she asked me who I'd choose, and I honestly said that I would choose the dog. FML

#21346972
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1632) - you deserved it (903)

On 01/30/2015 at 7:13pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I felt a painful lump on my jaw. After going on Google, I was convinced I either had an infected tooth or jaw cancer. In a panic, I rushed to the dentist and told the receptionist the problem. She pulled the dentist from an appointment, and he felt around my jaw. It was just a pimple. FML

#21346970
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (917) - you deserved it (1603)

On 01/30/2015 at 7:11pm - health - by not a cancerous pimple - United States (Pennsylvania)



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